Page 75 of Cowboy SEAL Christmas

Monica could only stare at him. She wasn’t even sure what the hell they were talking about anymore, but…

She had to figure it out. She had a ten-year-old who depended on her, patients who needed her. She had to figure everything out, make sense of it, analyze it, and then decide on the best course of action.

Except when it came to caring about Gabe, loving him. God, she was an idiot for loving him, but she did. There was no best course of action here. A relationship with him undermined her role as therapist at Revival. It justdid.

Added to the fact he didn’t want her. Not her or her care, and she wasn’t stupid enough to throw herself at a brick wall.

He wasn’t her father. There was no PTSD to cure, so she’d have the person she’d once known back. There were only all these impossible roadblocks.

She jumped when her phone rang. With shaking hands, she pulled it from her pocket.Mom.

She felt so perilously close to tears, but she had to answer. She had to hear how Colin was doing and talk to him herself and…

She swiped to answer the call and swallowed, realizing she had to keep the tears out of her voice. If she wasn’t careful, her mother would sense it. She’d demand to know what was wrong. What could Monica possibly tell her?I don’t know.

Not figuring something out sounded like her absolute worst nightmare and yet…here she was, not figuring it out. She had no answers, and the thing she wanted most in this world right now, to cry to her mother and ask for advice, just wasn’t possible.

“Hi, Mom. How’s it going?”

“Good. How are you?”

“Well, we’ve had a bit of a blizzard. Power’s out. I’m good on provisions and lots of firewood to keep me warm, but my phone is getting low, and I don’t know when… Just in case I don’t answer tomorrow, don’t get worried.”

“A blizzard? And you’re alone stuck in that cabin? With only firewood?”

She glanced at Gabe, standing there staring at her with that inscrutable gaze. No, she wasn’t alone, but a part of her wished she was. Alone was better than not knowing what to do. “I’ll be fine. I promise.”

“Well, you save that battery for emergencies. We can talk more later.”

“Let me talk to Colin first.”

“Save your batt—”

“Mom. Please.” She needed to hear Colin’s voice. She needed something to remind her she was not the utter failure and fool she felt like right now. She needed someone who loved her. Someone she loved, and it wasn’t complicated at all. He was hers and always would be.

“Hi, Mom,” Colin’s voice said into her ear.

She nearly choked on a sob, but she kept it inside. Swallowed it down and turned away from Gabe, so he couldn’t watch her desperately try to keep it together. “Hey, baby. How’s it going?”

“Awesome. Grandpa took me to the shooting range, and I got to shoot his big gun. He said next year he’ll take me hunting.”

“Oh. Joy.” But it was normal—her father pushing the boundaries of what she wanted Colin to do. Normal and good. She took a deep breath as Colin kept talking.

“And Grandma let me help make the cookies and didn’t get mad at me like you always do.”

Well, that one hurt.

“She froze some for you.”

“Good. I can’t wait to be there and see you.”

“Oh, and they bought me a bunch of books and I’ve read like three.”

“You…read three books.” She was forever trying to get Colin to read. She’d tried bribing and ignoring and offering a million incentives and…

With her parents, he was happily making cookies and learning to hold a weapon and reading.

So much for not feeling like a failure. “I miss you.”

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