Page 51 of Cowboy SEAL Christmas

“I think I’ll pass.”

“Coward.”

“There’s a difference between a coward and a man who knows when to tactfully retreat.”

“So which are you being with me?” she asked, unable to stop herself. She nearly held her breath over the answer. But he walked, mulling it over, until she had to blow out the breath.

“Hell if I know,” he muttered.

Chapter 13

Gabe wasn’t going to do it. There was no way he was going to be this stupid.

But he was sitting in his truck, wasn’t he? Cold and dark as he watched the night sky out the windshield. Clouds were rolling in, but pockets of winter stars still peeked through.

He wasn’t going to do it. This was a moment of insanity, and he was going to break it and go back to the bunkhouse where he belonged.

Even if the wordcowardhaunted him. And her question about tactical retreats and the difference between them. What did it matter what she thought he was doing? What did it matter whathethought he was doing? All that mattered was the doing.

And he was not doingthis.

The porch light of the house turned on, and hell if Gabe was going to explain sitting in a truck in the middle of a winter night without having turned the damn thing on.

He started the truck. He’d go to Pioneer Spirit. Get drunk. Of course, there’d be no way to get home, since Jack was no longer his bar partner.

Didn’t matter. That was a problem for future Gabe. And this was current Gabe, and he was not going to Monica’s little cabin where she’d be home alone.

Alone. All alone.

If he was going to have a discussion with her about that kiss, it would be on safe, neutral ground. That wasn’t cowardly. That was smart. It was strategic.

They probably didn’t even need to have a discussion. It wasn’t like he was going to be building any relationships. He knew how that sort of thing went, and it was fine enough for someone like Becca and Alex or Jack and Rose, but Gabe knew far better than to give anyone that kind of power over him.

Monica wasn’t the type of woman who’d be interested in something casual or temporary. Even if something between them was possible, it wasn’t possible.

But as he drove down the road, he couldn’t help but slow down at the turnoff that would take him to the Shaw ranch. Which would take him to Monica’s cabin.

Why wouldn’t he go talk to her now? When they had some privacy to air it all out? They would talk like two rational adults who didn’t have to worry about prying, friendly eyes or impressionable, youthful ears.

Find a way to be around each other without being awkward. He might be involved with the cattle, and she might be involved with the therapeutic horsemanship, but there were still areas in the foundation where they’d both have to give their opinions and suggestions without things being…weird.

That kiss couldn’t linger between them every time they had a business conversation. It would be a distraction and a problem. So he’d go tell her it was a mistake, that it had meant nothing.

He turned onto the road. It was the right thing to do. It wasn’t like she was going to fall into bed with him. Certainly not if he made it clear that there was nothing to start. She wasn’t going to agree to something temporary and superficial. She didn’t have that mind-set.

That was that, and all he had to do was make it clear. No hard feelings. He was an expert at no hard feelings, wasn’t he?

He followed the road that curved up the rise. Moonlight shone down through a clearing in the clouds on the path of icy, glittery snow. Maybe it was some sort of positive sign all in all, a beacon of light leading him to exactly what he needed to do at the right exact time.

No other symbolism beyond that.

When the drive forked, Gabe took the snowy path of tire tracks that would lead him to the cabin. It was out of sight of the main house, so he didn’t have to worry about his headlights raising any questions.

He parked his truck next to hers in front of the warm, cozy-looking cabin, shining bright with both lamplight from inside and twinkling Christmas lights all over the front of the house.

Gabe stepped out of his truck and stared at hers. She’d bought it with Alex’s help and advice, and wouldn’t that be weird? Taking advice from someone you were…

Gabe didn’t even know how to put it. What Monica was doing for Alex by being his therapist. Jack and Alex discussed it enough for Gabe to know it wasn’t anything like his experience with therapists. It was all about coping mechanisms and working through thinking patterns.

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