Page 30 of A Nice Day for a Cowboy Wedding

“Okay. Are you going to . . . explain said thing?”

“No.” God, no. This man in front of her would not understand a sore spot or an insecurity. He would not understand someone who hadn’t been a very good person in parts of her life. Who had been weak enough to be manipulated and harmed and . . . No, she might think he was easy to talk to and nice to look at, but they were just on opposite sides of the world. “We’re awfully different, Shane. I’m not sure we’d ever really understand each other.”

“Okay.” His puzzled frown didn’t disappear, but there was no other way to explain this whole thing to him. Not him.

She forced herself to smile. “Lunch then? Gavin said something about weed killing and then maybe another ride. I hope we aren’t keeping you from your work?”

“No. No, it’s fine,” Shane said, none of the confusion in his tone dissipating.

She started walking for the hall, hoping she could find the kitchen or dining room or wherever Gavin and Micah had gone off to.

“So that wasn’t flirting?”

Cora stopped mid-step. She wanted the floor to swallow her whole. Because shehadbeen flirting. One hundred percent. But that was before he’d insinuated she couldn’t handle her life and . . .

“Uh.” Her cheeks warmed, which was so odd because she didn’t blush. She usually got defensive or bold, never embarrassed. She didn’t even know what to say when usually she could babble her way out of any situation.

“It felt like flirting, but if we’re so different, maybe I was misreading.” Except he sounded a little smug, not contrite or worried he’d read into things.

“Well, I don’t know about you, butIwas flirting,” she replied, offering him an arch look.

His mouth curved, and all those butterflies she’d thought had died violent deaths just a little while ago winged back to life. Yeah, they were different. Yes, she could never really show him all those ugly sides of her, but wasn’t that okay? New leaf Cora?

Except shehadmade a resolution. For herself. For her son.

“I’m sorry. I think you’re hot. And nice. But I’m . . .”A mess. No, not that. Not anymore. “I made a New Year’s resolution. No guys this year. No . . . No.”

“Okay.” His eyebrows drew together. “We’re too different, and you have a New Year’s resolution?”

“Yes.”

“Are you making that up? Because I can handle a little rejection. It’s July. A little late in the year to be using resolution excuses.”

She wanted to laugh, and some odd part of her wanted to cry. “No, I’m not trying to spare your feelings. I’m just . . .” Sometimes honesty was the best policy. She couldn’t be honest about all of herself, but she could be honest about this. “I’m trying to be a good mom and a good person, and I haven’t had very much luck doing that when there’s a man in my life.”

“Gotcha.” He made a gesture toward the hallway. “Let’s get some lunch then.”

Cora nodded, stepping into the hall, feeling oddly wrung out emotionally. It had just been a little conversation. An admittance to a certain amount of attraction, and a slightly more depressing admission that she couldn’t act on it.

Even when life wasn’t hard, it was complicated. She followed Shane down the hall, wishing she knew how to make things different.

“For the record,” Shane said in a low voice, glancing back at her over his shoulder, “I’d never want to get in the way of your being a good mom or a good person, since those are things I like about you.”

He dropped that serious, dark gaze and stepped into the kitchen, giving her no opportunity to respond to that, and maybe that was for the best. She didn’t know what she would have said, and she was a little afraid she might have cried if she’d tried to say anything.

* * *

Shane felt broody that evening, and since he didn’t care to dwell in a brood he couldn’t fix, he decided to dwell on one he could.

He’d called a meeting of his siblings. They needed to nip the Ben Donahue situation in the bud once and for all.

Gavin plopped a twelve-pack of beer on the old table. Since they’d been kids they’d turned this small corner of the barn into something of a private space. When Mom got rid of a piece of furniture that still had some use, one of them would drag it out to the little room in the barn that had once been Dad’s outdoor office.

Right now it boasted a table, five chairs, and a few battery-powered lamps. They’d had a mini fridge out here for a while, but it had bit the dust a few years ago, and the thrill of sneaking beer wasn’t quite as big when you were grown adults.

Gavin settled himself on his chair, a worn leather beast that had once been in Dad’s indoor office. Shane sat in his chair, which had been part of a kitchen set. It was uncomfortable and had a creaking, loose leg, but it still held his weight. Lindsay and Molly entered the barn, Molly with a jug of water and Lindsay with one of her ever-present boxes of candy.

There was an empty, overturned crate Boone had used once upon a time. It always stood out like an empty, sore thumb.

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