Page 100 of Cowboy SEAL Homecoming

“Just love me,” Becca returned.

Mom looked over at her, still pained, but Becca thought maybe they’d had a good talk. She had to remember that even though it had been a year, her mother was still grieving and getting used to her new life. It wasn’t an exciting new start like it was for Becca. Mom had to figure out who she was and what she wanted to be all over again.

“I do love you,” Mom finally said. “More than I’d ever be able to…” She shook her head, still teary, still struggling. “Love is complicated, and I’m sorry if mine ever…hurt you.”

“I love you too, and I’m sorry if mine ever hurt you.”

Mom managed a wobbly smile. “I used to think love shouldn’t hurt, but once you’re a mom, you realize it always will.”

Becca thought of Alex, of the pain in watching him struggle with that nightmare last night, and she understood that in a way she might not have not so long ago. Love did hurt, but she wanted to believe it could heal too. When you opened up like this.

She thought she understood her mother better, and that her mom understood her better.

“You could always help us. I know being on the ranch is hard, but there are things you could do for the foundation in town.” Involve Mom instead of shut her out.

“There are?”

“Sure. In fact, I’m trying to find a place for the therapist I’ve hired. She has a son. He’s nine. She said they don’t need much, but something affordable, obviously. Something close to the ranch, but close to a bus stop for the school. You know people and talk to people in town. Maybe you could see if anyone’s renting anything out or selling. We could use help from someone who’s not drowning in ranch life. What do you say?”

Mom dropped her hand from Pal and stepped forward, taking Becca’s hands in hers. “I say I have an unbelievably amazing daughter who humbles me daily.”

“Who’s everything she is because of you.”

“And Burt.”

Becca smiled. “And a few very good animal listeners.”

Mom managed a laugh.

“Mom, I know you don’t want to see my heart broken, and you have reservations about Alex, but I really, really like him and how I feel with him. He makes me feel strong and confident, and you know I’ve never felt either of those things.”

“So, back off, Mom. Huh?” Mom said with a heavy sigh.

“Just a little.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“Then come in and help me make lunch. Eat with us. I think if you spent some time…”

But Mom was looking at the ranch house, ghosts flashing through her eyes, painfully enough Becca didn’t finish.

“Not today, sweetheart. I need to work up to going in there again. That dinner was one thing because I was protecting you, but being in there just to be in there? I can’t. Not yet. I’m going to head back to town, and I will find you your affordable housing for your therapist. How does that sound?”

“Perfect.”

Becca knew life was never perfect. In fact, every time it felt a little bit perfect, something drastic happened to upend everything. But she didn’t want to think about the possibility of that right now.

Right now, she was going to enjoy the perfect while it lasted.

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