Page 20 of Bride for Keeps

Mrs. Shuller nodded. “She’ll be there.”

Chapter Five

“Mom. Seriously. Iam not in the mood for…anything.”

“It’ll do you some good to get out and walk around. I promise.”

Sierra doubted it. She’d rather wallow. All her determinations from yesterday were gone after the fight she’d had with Carter. She just wanted tomope.

They never fought. It was all she could think about. She and Carter never fought. It was one of the things she loved about him. She could go off the handle and yell and stomp and he’d calmly, placidly take it. He’d smile or give her a hug. Not give anger and frustration right back.

It twisted everything up. It made herhurtto watch him get angry or defensive or think he was right and she was wrong. It brought up childhood memories of watching Dad and Luke fight bitterly. The feeling was the same—twisted up and uncomfortable, wishing the conflict would just go away. She’d learned to run away from that. When Dad had been mad at her as a teenager, she snuck out. Partied. Anything to keep her mind offconflict.

Why on earth was Carter giving her conflict now? When they should just walk away from each other and be done with it? Love didn’t matter when your life wasn’t working, and how could love exist when you were yelling at each other?

Sierrahatedthis. Mostly because she couldn’t control Carter’s reaction. She couldn’t make him not care. She couldn’t make him walk away.

Whywasthat when he’d been, at best, a robot for months? When he’d made her feel like he’d finally figured out what a horrible match she was for him? Now all of a sudden he wanted to understand it and fight for it?

She didn’t know how to make sense of this, and what’s more, she didn’t want to. Better to end it, even if that was running away. Fresh starts would be better. For both of them.

She sighed and looked out the window as Mom parked a little ways off from Java Café. The prospect of walking into the little café, seeing people she knew, seeing people Carter knew—

“Mom. Really. I can’t.”

Mom put the car in park and looked over at her. “Okay. You stay put, I’ll go grab us some sandwiches, okay? Maybe even grab some to take over to Kaitlin and Beckett. I need my Ellie fix. What do you think?”

“Yeah, okay.” Even though thinking about babies was a little daunting, it was better than thinking about her feelings and all the conflict inside her.

Mom smiled and got out of the car and walked across the street to Java. Sierra hunched in her seat and looked at her lap. But that only occupied her for so long and eventually her gaze drifted out the windshield. Above the squat brick buildings that lined Main, Copper Mountain stood looking stately and important against the impossibly blue winter sky.

As a teenager the sight had filled her with dread. Like that mountain was always glaring imperiously down at her. Like God, very much displeased with her decisions.

Now it looked like any other mountain. Neither evil nor benevolent. Just rock and time.

When the driver’s side door opened Sierra tried to fix a smile on her face as she glanced over at her mother. Except it wasn’t her mother sliding into the driver’s seat so soon after disappearing inside.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” she demanded.

Carter didn’t blink, flinch or act like this was completely inappropriate. “Our five minutes,” he replied as if this was some plan she’d agreed to.

“No.”

“It was a deal, and your mother agreed to stay inside for precisely five minutes, so we really should start talking.”

“It was not a deal, or if it was, I changed my mind.”

“But I didn’t.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. “And you’re all that matters?”

“Of course not,” he replied easily and sensibly. A Carter she recognized, down to the way his blue eyes seemed to match the sky. “But if it takes two to start a marriage, it should be the agreement of two to end it.”

“Actually, I think that’s generally not how that works.”

“Regardless. All I’m asking is five minutes today. Is that really so much of your day?”

She looked away. It wasn’t. She just didn’twantto keep feeling this awful. She wanted to move on. To be done. She didn’t want to fight or rehash or give him the opportunity to convince her into another mistake.

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