Page 122 of Stealing Sunshine

“What?”

Her brows shoot up to her hairline. “That wasn’t fake. Not for you, and sure as hell not for her. When did that happen?”

“It was never fake for me.”

“I know that. Does she?”

Guilt squeezes my stomach. “No.”

“How are you handling that?”

“Have you been taking counselling lessons in your spare time?” I snap, my protective instincts flaring wide.

“No. If I had been, I’d know better than to ask you these questions head-on. I’m your best friend, Ice.”

“Are you?”

She flinches. “Am I what?”

“Nothing,” I mutter, shifting my body so I face the windows along the side of the studio instead of her.

Feet pad along the floor, and then hands find mine, clasping them in a tight hold. I don’t pull from the touch. If anything, I want to pull her into my arms and squeeze her instead.

“Look at me, Ice,” Poppy demands, pulling at my hands.

I force myself to. The deep-rooted sadness I’ve buried over the past few months is yanked back to the surface at the helplessness in her expression.

“I fucking miss you, Poppy.”

Her face crumples, tears filling her eyes. “I miss you so much.”

When she wraps me in a hug, I’m powerless to the sting behind my eyes. Her vanilla-scented perfume smells like home and comfort, and I hug her close, squeezing too hard.

“I’m proud of you, Pops. For your success and the love you’ve found. But I don’t know where I fit into your life anymore,” I whisper.

Her hold on me tightens to the point of pain. “You fit where I need you to and where you want to be. There will always be a spot reserved for you right at the centre of me. I’m sorry I’ve made you feel like you weren’t a focal point in my life. I’ve been trying to find a balance, but I’m doing a shitty job of it.”

“I’m used to the lives we all had years ago before everything started to change. First, it was Anna on tour with Brody for months on end, then you moved to Calgary, and it was like everyone was outgrowing Cherry Peak but me.”

“Bryce,” she says on an exhale. Loosening her hold, she stares at me, eyes glistening. “Not everyone needs to outgrow their home. I might be gone, but nowhere I go will ever be Cherry Peak.”

I wipe away the lone tear that’s escaped. “I’m just having a hard time adjusting.”

“So am I. And if there was a way that I could move back home with Garrison and make it work with his job, I would. You know that, right? I never would have left.”

“I know, Pops.”

She’d have been content with only one studio as long as she had everyone she loved and needed in her life around her. But she also deserves this success more than anyone else.

“There hasn’t been a single day that’s passed since I left where I haven’t hated being away from you. I’m sorry, and I’ll do better with splitting my time.”

I’m a fucking mess of emotions. That’s the only explanation I have for the words that explode from my mouth.

“I love her.”

Poppy blinks a few times, her lips parting on invisible words.

“Daisy,” I add, shoving a hand through my hair. “I love her.”