“What the fuck are you talking about?” he asks, wide-eyed and lips pressing together.
He scrolls over the writing on the front page of the agreement at lightning speed, and I feel incredibly smug to have pulled a reaction from him with this. It’s about time he’s felt the hard smack of reality.
Welcome to the club, asshole.
“I didn’t come here because I missed you and Surrey, Chris. It was to make sure you knew that I’m done with you thinking you still have any pull or say in my life. Everything you need to know from now on is in that agreement. Including the extent of the contact between you and me.”
Or lack thereof. Unless we’re speaking about Nova, there won’t be a word coming from either of us.
He flips through the next page and then the next, only pausing his searching when he stumbles upon the exact section I was expecting him to pay more attention to than any other.
“You’re not asking for child support?”
I keep my expression blank. “No. I would rather you use that money to take care of Nova while she’s here. There’s more outlined in the agreement involving holidays.”
“You’re going to share them with me now?”
I swallow down a laugh. “No. But you will get a set day following every holiday to spend time with her. There are conditions, though, considering how little you’ve cared about celebrating them in the past. First, you’ll receive a list of gift ideas from me for both her birthday and Christmas and be expected to get her at least one of those items. If you can’t afford something, I’ll send you the money needed. And if you take that money and still don’t follow through, all holiday celebrations will be stripped from you.”
The hit to his pride is obvious in the tightening of his jaw and flushing of his cheeks. I enjoy every single moment of his suffering.
It’s been a long time coming for all of this, and it feels so incredibly freeing to be laying it all out there with a legal team and family at my back. The repercussions of his lack of care and responsibility have weighed on me for years, but no more. That ends today. It’s time to move on from him and the hold he’s had on me and Nova.
“And second,” I continue, spine straight, “if she declinescelebrating with you, that’s that. That counts for everything, even outside of holidays.
“Fuck up one too many times, and she’ll decide you’re not worth her time, Chris. And I’m going to be there supporting her every step of the way. This is serious. It’s not a game where you can lose and come back over and over again to try to win. If you keep hurting her the way you have been, it will be game over. No more chances. You’ll lose her forever, and I won’t be here for you encouraging her to reconsider her decision.”
Flipping through to the next and final page, he glances up at me and flicks his tongue to wet his lips. I cringe at the weird nervous habit of his and seriously consider what was wrong with me to think that this man was what I wanted, both emotionally and sexually.
“I’ll need a lawyer of my own to look over this. If I decide it’s all worth agreeing to,” he grumbles.
“You can have two weeks.”
“Fine.”
“Are you still good to take her this weekend?”
“Am I allowed to?”
I slowly exhale, keeping calm. “Yes, you’re allowed to see her. Every second weekend will still be yours, as long as there are no more early drop-offs. She was really fucking hurt when you discarded her as if she wasn’t anything more than baggage last time. It’s stuck with her.”
“Something came up.”
“Yeah, I bet. It doesn’t matter now. Just be at the house on Saturday morning at nine. If you’re late, you can wait another two weeks. I’m done with the babying. You’re a grown man and a father to a seven-year-old girl who wants to spend time getting to know her father. I’m begging you to act like it and quit letting her down every chance you get. She won’t be a little girl forever. You’ll look back on these days years from now and wish you hadn’t acted this way.”
“And you and Oliver?” he asks after a beat of silence, avoidingmy eyes and staring down at the papers in his hands. “That’s for real? It’s serious?”
My brain lags at the . . . sincerity in the question. The lack of judgment and fire in his tone is startling. Unexpected to the point of confusion.
“It’s serious,” I answer, keeping my tone strong yet still gentle. “He’s not going anywhere. He’ll be in our lives for . . . Well, for a long time, I hope.”
It looks like it pains him to speak, but when he does, the jealousy I expect isn’t there. “Okay. I’ll see you Saturday.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
I take the break in arguing to head out, only lingering for long enough to blurt out the last thought in my head before I lose my confidence.
“For what it’s worth, Chris, I really hope you get your shit together. For Nova. She deserves both of her parents in her life.”