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Lies, lies, lies. Already starting to stack up. Because the truth isn’t just that I’m seeing Marshall; it’s that no matter how early it is, I’m maybe a little bit smitten with him already. It’s a huge mistake. I’m not sure if I even realized it until this moment, but part of me wants to tell her I’m seeing someone. That he makes me feel buzzy inside, even if that makes absolutely no sense.

“Tell that to your face when you were talking about him. I’m hoping we get to meet this boy soon.”

“Mom, don’t. It’s not what you think, okay?”

“Okay,” she says with a smile that tells me she doesn’t believe me, and the thing is, I don’t believe me either.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Marshall

“Strip,” I tellmy sweet boy the moment he steps into my house.

“Yes, Sir.” He takes off his shoes, then his pants. It’s been a week since he texted me about fucking him and I answered with the photo of me with the Fleshlight. We haven’t met up since, and that was on purpose on my part. I don’t know why I’m putting off taking him, why I’ve kept him away even though what I want is to take him in every way possible, but despite texting with him every day, this past week has felt like ten weeks. I enjoy our conversations so much. He makes me laugh and feel young, makes me want to collect more moments of the happiness he makes me feel.

Once he’s beautifully naked in front of me, I study him—his high cheekbones, square jaw, muscular chest, and six-pack abs. He’s already hard, dick standing at attention, balls full and high and more mouthwatering than they have any right being.

“Turn, please,” I say, and he immediately does. “Spread your legs some, hands against the door.”

Jay moves into position, and I step behind him and kiss the back of his neck. “Look at you… You’re so beautiful. My naked little slut who begs for my cock.”

Jay trembles, his breathing picking up.

“I want it…so bad. I dream about taking it.”

“Do you now?” I reach around him, hand sliding down his chest to wrap around his cock. Jay hisses out in pleasure.

“Yes, Sir. I lie in bed, hard and leaking, wanting to be filled so badly…but I suffer through it for you. My orgasms belong to my Sir.”

I fight back a tremor of my own. The way he gets to me, ties me up and makes me want more, is intoxicating. “Good boy. I’m so proud of you.” I stroke him, then let go and smack his cock.

“Oh fuck!” Jay cries out. “How is it possible that you make me want to come so quickly?”

“Because I know how to reach you here.” I touch his temple. “Sex is about more than fucking and physical reaction, especially for kinky people like us. I can fuck your mind and make you come harder than if I only give you my cock.”

“Can’t I have both?” he asks, making me snicker. He does that in ways no one else can.

“Come.” I step away from him and head for the living room. I sit on the couch, wearing only jeans and underwear.

Jay kneels in front of me beautifully, then looks up at me with eyes filled with questions.

“What is it, sweet boy?”

“I want to talk to you, but I don’t want to sound unappreciative or like I’m not happy.”

I suppress a frown. “This doesn’t work without honesty. You won’t hurt my feelings. I need to know what works for you and what doesn’t. Tell me.”

He nods, pauses for a moment, then says, “I love everything we do. It’s so fucking hot, but I feel like you’re going easy on me…and that makes me feel like you don’t think I can handle what you want or like I’m not giving you what you need. I want to be good for you.”

His words wrap around me and hit the target in my chest. “You are. So good.” But he’s right. I have been going easy on him. I keep waiting for him to change his mind, and I don’t want to do something I can’t take back, but really, I can’t take any of itback. When this ends, is it going to be so different if I really hurt him or piss on him or deny him orgasms compared to what we’re doing now? I don’t think so. “I’m sorry I made you feel that way, and it’s clear I’m not quite being what you need.”

He shakes his head. “That’s not—”

I press my fingers to his lips. “Shh. It is, and that’s okay. I’m very proud of you for talking to me. Follow me.”

I haven’t taken Jay up to my room yet. I don’t know what’s held me back, but I take him there now, lead him upstairs to my large room with a king bed against the side wall and a balcony along the back. “Sit on the edge of the mattress.”

I go to the walk-in closet and pull out a tub of supplies. Some of them I had before, but others I’ve collected since I started this with Jay to have them around just in case. I pull out a crop, a dildo with a suction cup on the end, and satin ties.

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