Page 140 of You Float My Boat

One thing I’d learned through this mess I’d created, rubbing your fingers against your temples did absolutely nothing to ease the pressure. Or maybe it was that I had too much. Either way, every time I thought of Evie myblood boiled so quickly my brain was on the verge of exploding. My head simply did not have the space to figure out how to prove to Violet I loved her while also coming up with a solution to get Evie out of my life for good. Therefore, as Violet was my priority, I’d concentrated all my remaining brain cells on her.

‘I haven’t got that far.’

‘Well, I’d say as she’s trying to ruin your life, you could always ruin hers.’

Oz got up to flick the kettle on again. ‘Remind me never to get on your wrong side.’

‘I’m serious, you could fuck with her grades or something. What’s the point of being able to hack the university servers if you don’t use it when you need to?’

‘But what would that solve?’ I crossed my arms over my chest, ‘She’s leaving in a few months anyway when she graduates. And now term is over we no longer have class together.’

‘To be fair, failing grades isn’t going to stop her fucking with Charlie,’ Oz replied and looked over at me, ‘Why don’t you call Olly, he might be able to offer some advice.’

‘Why?’

‘Because he’s reading law. You never know, he might have some words of wisdom.’

I mean, one more brain added to the mix couldn’t do any harm.

Oz put three more steaming mugs of tea on the counter and sat back on his stool. Brooks’ chin was propped on his fist as I hit dial. Olly answered on the third ring.

‘Charles? What’s up? How’s training going?’

‘Yeah, good thanks, mate. Hope you’ve got the tissues ready, because Cambridge is going down.’

‘I’d rather you lost, if I’m honest. I’ve bet a lot of money on Cambridge winning now we have a new Blue Boat Cox.’

There was a sharp intake of breath to my right, followed by a loud tut. We hadn’t talked much about the fact we’d be racing directly against Kate. Outwardly Oz seemed more determined than ever to win this year – his final year as president – but I knew he wasn’t happy that winning would mean Kate would lose her first race in Blue Boat.

‘How is she?’ he asked.

‘I haven’t seen her for a week or so, but she seemed okay. Always with that hot friend of hers.’

‘Imogen,’ added Brooks, helpfully, because he may or may not have a huge crush on her.

He definitely did.

‘Ol,’ I interrupted before we got into a debate about the hotness of Imogen, ‘I need some advice about Evie.’

‘How someone hasn’t strangled that girl yet is beyond me.’

Next to me, Brooks and Oz mumbled their agreement.

‘Well, yes, anyway. Long story short, since she moved into my philosophy class and I started dating Violet, she’s become even more of a pain in the arse than usual.’

For a second I thought he’d been cut off, ‘Hang on … Violet? Violet Brooks? You’re dating? When did that happen?’

Ah. And there was the problem with grand plans and keeping secrets. Because when they all fell apart you had to start from the beginning to explain yourself, again. Which meant you realized how totally and utterly you’d ballsed things up.

I’d just opened my mouth when Brooks jumped in. ‘Evie joined Charlie’s class. Charlie needed a fake girlfriend to protect him, and asked Violet. Evie’s been tormenting them because now Charlie’s decided he loves Violet. Something happened with Evie and the race last weekend, Violet’s in a mood. Charlie needs to sort his shit out and now our kitchen currently looks like the next season location forThe Great British Bake Off.’ He looked at me and shrugged, ‘Did I miss anything?’

I picked up my tea. ‘No, think you got it all.’

‘Great. Thought it would be quicker if I told it.’

There was silence on the line and the three of us leaned in, waiting to see if Olly was going to speak. Unless he’d stopped listening and disconnected. I wouldn’t blame him.

‘Well, that’s quite a predicament, isn’t it?’ he said, eventually.

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