Page 127 of You Float My Boat

‘Yeah. My ability to find suitable drinking establishments is unmatched.’

It took us nearly half an hour but we made it, virtually unscathed. The same could not be said for another rugby ball which this time, unfortunately, came into contact with Stella, and promptly found itself launched into the nearest hedge. The pub was quiet in comparison to those further up the river, and I managed to pee quick enough that our drinks hadn’t arrived by the time I got to the bar.

‘I’m going now. You wait here,’ Stella called as she ran off.

‘Hello.’

I turned to my right, and the owner of the voice I’d come to recognize. She really was like a bad smell.

‘What do you want, Evie?’

‘Just came to offer my sympathy.’ She jerked up a delicate little shoulder, the straps on her black sun dress barely moving.

I was too busy watching the barman pour out the two glasses of wine to really pay attention to anything Evie was saying. Plus, I wasn’t interested.

‘You know, about you and Charlie breaking up.’

My attention flicked to her, and back to the barman as he put two glasses down. I handed my bank card over to him.

‘What?’

‘Well, I assumed you’d broken up seeing as he asked me to meet him if they lost today. You know, to commiserate, I s’pose.’

‘You’re full of shit. Please go and bother someone else.’

At least I expected to be totally ignored, and she was still standing there when Stella returned.

‘What’s going on? Why are you here? Honestly don’t you have anything better to do with your time except torment people?’

‘No, not really.’

Even when Stella stepped in, towering over her, Evie didn’t flinch. ‘Were you following us?’

‘No,’ she shrugged, ‘just a lucky coincidence I guess.’

‘I don’t believe in coincidences.’

‘Oh well.’

I wasn’t sure who was going to win this staring competition. Stella had the height, but Evie had the deadness behind her eyes that made her seem invincible.

‘I’ll make it your problem unless you fuck off right now. Seriously, just fuck off. Leave Violet alone, leave me alone and leave Charlie alone.’

I tugged on Stella’s arm, ‘Come on, she’s not worth it. Let’s get our drinks and go.’

‘Why is she here?’ she hissed, spinning back around to Evie who hadn’t moved. ‘Why are you here?’

‘I was just congratulating Violet on the boys’ win.’

‘What?’

I tugged again, waving Stella’s drink in her face, hoping she’d get the message. ‘Stella, let’s go. She’s full of shit.’

‘But I specifically wanted to let Violet know that in class this week Charlie had asked if I’d meet him for a drink if they lost today. You know … to console him.’

Stella’s head twisted around to mine, but I held my mouth in a straight line and said nothing. She turned back to Evie. ‘You’re a filthy stinkin’ liar.’

I wasn’t sure Stella needed to add the 1920s American Gangster accent onto it, but it did add a little something. Evie was unfazed by it, however. Merely offered up a shrug and one of those smarmy smiles I really wanted to smack off her face.

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