Page 122 of The Baller

“Thank you,” I replied and gestured toward him. “See? I can handle myself.”

My mom’s eyes flicked to his and back to me. “Radley, because of my job you’re a prominent face. People know what you look like, and they know where you are. Protecting you from it is the only thing I have in my power. It’s frat boys today, but it could be extremists tomorrow.”

“Mom…” I begged, knowing exactly where this was leading. It was a car crash, and no matter how hard I pumped on the breaks, I knew I was about to go headfirst into a brick wall.

“I’m going to increase your protection.”

“No! Mom, No. I have enough. I don’t need more. Four in the day, four when I sleep. I agreed on eight if you let me go to Columbia. I’m supposed to be getting my life back.”

“Yourlife, Radley. I’m not negotiating with you on keeping you safe. I want you safe.”

“There’s a difference between safe and suffocated!” I wailed, so close to the angry, rage-filled tears which were bursting their banks that I almost couldn’t see straight. “This is so unfair. You’re not doing this to Ben while he’s still in school, and what about Henry?”

“They haven’t been through what you’ve been through!” she argued back. “And now you’re dating a baseball player…”

“Lux, mom. His name is Lux. You know that. You’ve seen him play.”

“I know.” Her reply came through gritted teeth, and from the way she was pausing before she spoke, I could tell she was on the verge of losing it. But I didn’t care. I’d already lost it. “My point is, you’re with someone who’s also well known. You’re out in public more, and the two of you are being photographed. All month long there have been photos of you; ice skating, at lunch, out with Millie...”

“People are always going to take photos of me.”

My dad held his hands up, doing his best to cut through the tension building in the room and stopping me from interrupting, oreruptingas was more likely.

“Radley, we’re not saying you can’t go out. We’re saying that the more you do, the more people will see you. And we,” he waved his hand around the room, “don’t want what happened today to happen again.”

I shook my head; they didn’t get it.

How could they possibly understand how stifling this life was that I never asked for? I wanted to hand it all back. I wanted tobe free to make my own mistakes without the world knowing. I’d done everything that had been asked of me, and it still wasn’t enough.

“You know what? This entire semester, all I’ve done is dodge frat boy after frat boy. I’ve held my tongue, I’ve stayed in, I’ve hidden, I’ve taken back exits from restaurants. I’ve avoided being out in public too much, I’ve behaved. And now I’ve met someone I want to spend my spare time with, and I don’t want to do it by hiding behind a protective wall.” I glared at my mom, but she wasn’t budging. I knew that look on her face, and finally the hot, angry tears dropped out of me; big, fat, wet tears splashing on the White House carpet with the Seal of the President. “This is total bullshit.”

“We just want to keep you safe,” my dad repeated.

Drawing my sleeve across my face to dry it as best I could, I stood up. I was calling time on this conversation. Someone had to, or we’d be going around and around all night long. “Well, you’ll have to do it from New York. I’m not staying here.”

I didn’t look back as I marched out, ignoring both my parents calling after me, but I was going too fast for their voices to carry for long.

“I take it we’re going to the Four Seasons?” asked Jake, who’d been waiting outside, and jogged to keep up with me.

“Yup.”

It was only as I burst though the West Wing doors and into the freezing cold did I realize I’d forgotten my jacket. I wasn’t going back for it; it would stay with the rest of my things I’d left there.

Twenty minutes later, I found myself pulled against Lux’s chest, the solid wall of muscle that gave me nothing but comfort, and listened to the sigh of relief at being back together. Ieased away, taking in his tousled hair, making it clear he’d done nothing but pull on the ends since I’d left him an hour ago.

“Well?” he asked.

“Can you take me back to New York, please?”

TWENTY-FIVE

LUX

How many pancakesis too many pancakes?

If you live with Ace Watson, you never find out.

“Dude, you’re gonna be sick.”

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