Page 6 of My Grumpy Valentine

Five years away from Hope Peak didn’t heal me in the way I wanted it to. Until today, I have been managing each day one at a time. I found a fulfilling career, consistently earned a paycheck, and lived as I was meant to.Alone. It took years to get her off my mind, to return to a state where my heart didn’t ache in my chest every time I saw something that reminded me of her.

For the entire first year, I checked her social media and kept up that way. From a safe distance, I couldn’t risk ruining what those two had together. On the worst nights, I looked at their wedding photos to remind myself why I’d left in the first place.

While I wasn’t pretending the white dress was meant for me, I focused on Danny’s happy smile. I was his best man, for fuck’s sake. In half of the pictures,I’mthere. Smiling like an Oscar-winning actor.

And he let her go.

Balling my fists up, I thump them against the wheel and accidentally honk. The poor older couple strolling down a nearby sidewalk jerk in surprise, and the best I can offer is a lifted hand as an apology.

I’m an asshole. All this time away has only soured my outlook. After accepting that I would never meet ‘the one’ because she was already married, I gave up on the whole idea of love. I decided to banish it entirely from my life.

Before I met Pen a solid seven years ago, I didn’t believe in it then, either. She gave me hope, even if it was impossible.

To think I’d run into her again so quickly after all these years. Or that I convinced myself that I would be okay if we ever saw each other again.

Groaning in the back of my throat, I pull into August’s Auto Body & Repair and take my usual parking spot. Tearing into the bag of food, I attempt to fill this forming hunger.

I’d never have run into her if Trenton hadn’t suggested the place.

If I’d stayed at that little joint and tried to enjoy my meal, I’d be too busy eating with my eyes. My burger would be as cold as the winter temperature, keeping everyone frozen. I’d run out of time during my break because I’d stare too long. From the soft-looking, pastel pink of her uniform to the rosy flush on her cheeks, kissed by the brisk, chilled air, she looked as adorable as I remember.

However, one thing has changed.

Once a ray of sunshine, her fire has been doused by whatever is going wrong in her life.

Not wanting to ruin her recommendation because of my soured thoughts, I put Danny at the back of my mind. After leaving them both behind, I shouldn’t go thinking freely.

If I’m going to be honest with myself, I shouldn’t return to that little drive-in. Staying away from her has saved me from making a lot of mistakes. The mention of her divorce should’ve made my chest ache. Instead, that bastard whispering terrible things in the back of my mind encourages me to swoop her up and show her what true love means.

What it means to know she’ll never be let go.

Cursing under my breath, I chomp at my food. It’s delicious. At least if I cave and go back, I have an excuse to return.

I should ask her out for a coffee or something. Not a date or anything of the sort. A friendly outing. An excuse to catch up over the missed years. Whatever I have to call it, to push me toward Penelope. Take an hour or two of her time. It’ll itch this little scratch forming, and I’ll have what I need to move on.

I made a mistake by trying to cut her from my life cold turkey. Even if I had a conversation worth only a few words, the damage is done. What I truly need now is a gradual and thoughtful withdrawal, allowing me to ease back into a state of solitude and find the peace I long for once again.

Once I finish up my lunch, I sit and collect myself. If I go back into the shop now, one of the guys will notice something is up and start poking. Can’t go unraveling myself.

My phone vibrates and I thank whoever is on the other side for the distraction. Checking out the notification, my heart feels like it stops and falls into the pit of my stomach. The food is now threatening to come back up.

Is this Asher?

She kept my number. After all these years, she never threw me out of her life. Not like I had tried to do to her.

I pause, hesitating over the letters. Wondering what to say first, I’m tempted to let everything spill out. Holding onto my feelings for what feels like a lifetime, I’m ready to explode.

The option to delete the message and pretend it doesn’t exist is an option. It’s the right option, and the one I should pick if I want to be smart.

Instead, I type inyesand hit send.

* * *

With each gentle tap of my fingers against the polished surface of the table, I fight the restless urge to shift in my seat.

I’mnervous. When in the hell did that become a thing?

Willow Hope is packed, and it’s a Thursday night. What has come of this world? Don’t people have to work or have families to hang out with?

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