Page 18 of Ironhold, Trial Four

“You don't have to do this,” Rowan says.

“I do, though,” I say. “I don't want to be alone and… if he really wants to kill me, I need to know what I can do differently. I need to think of a way to beat him.”

“If you fight him again it will be becausehe has lunged at you out of the dark,” Rowan says. “The key will be to strike swiftly and surely.”

That's easier said than done. Callus is fast and dangerous. I only survived this time because of the intervention of Lord Darius and Lady Selene.

Rowan can obviously see the fear on my face. He wraps his arms around me, drawing me to his chest. I look up at him. In that moment I want… all kinds of things. But I also find myself thinking of Alaric. Alaric with whom I argued in the beast pens. Alaric, who should be the one doing this. Why isn't he here? I know he is with his mother, I know he is thinking about being parted from me should he succeed in these games, and about the pain that would cause, but I want…

Right now, I’m not sure what I want, or who.

Rowan arranges for Zara and Cescato go with me to the bathhouse, because I must wash the dust and mud of the day from me. A part of me wants to invite him to go with me, to use the excuse of not being alone to get in there butthat just brings back more memories of Alaric, as I first met him, wrapped in a towel there because I had gone at the wrong time.

Luxuriating in the water of the bathdoes something to restore my strength. Cesca is recounting Every detail of her fight from earlier, excited in the way that only someone who has fought for the first time can be.

“Oh enough!” Zara says, dunking her under the water. That prompts some playful fighting between the two.

When we're done, we head for the dining hall. Rowan is there waiting for us, looking worried and keeping a careful eye on the spot where Callus is sitting. It seems obvious he's been watching him all this time, making sure that he doesn't go anywhere near me.

He takes over the task of guarding me as we sit and eat and drink. There are those who will celebrate tonight because they have survived their first bout of the games. There are those who will go into each other's rooms just to spend the time with one another. There is nothing like closeness to death to bring out passion. Somewhere in it, Zara and Cesca rise, heading back to their respective rooms. Or maybe tooneof their rooms, judging by the looks going between them.

I stay with Rowan in the hall. It's getting later. Alaric should be back by now, although he's not here, in the hall. That doesn't necessarily mean anything though because he's a noble and nobles can have food brought to their rooms. Maybe he's still keeping his distance. I understand why he’s doing it, pulling back from me to save himself the pain of having to watch me when he’s done in the arena, but I can’t just let everything between us go that easily. And… whatever else is true, he is my ally. He has sworn it. Maybe he will be the help I need with Callus.

“I want to go find Alaric,” I say, suddenly.

“You can't just go wandering the halls by yourself,” Rowan points out, with a look across to Callus. “Do you think he won't stalk you the momenthe sees you go off alone? And anyway, shouldn't the nobleman be here? Shouldn't he be checking on you, not the other way around?”

Rowan doesn't bother to hidethe disdain he feels for Alaric’s nobility, his arrogance, and possibly the fact that he's the one with me, when Rowan feels it should be him.

“Please, Rowan,” I say. “If you don’t want me to be alone, come with me. Alaric should know what’s happening, at least. He’s our ally. And you can’t watch me all the time.”

“I can try.”

“But you can’tbethere all the time,” I insist. “Maybe if we tell Alaric, he’ll help.”

“I…” Rowan hesitates, but then he nods. “All right. I might not like him, but I’ll admit, for something like this, he might be useful. I’ll go with you to find him.”

We need the help. Callus is a dangerous foe, and Rowan cannot watch me in every moment. If I do not find more protection, I will not survive.

CHAPTER TWELVE

Rowan follows me closely as I make my way through Ironhold, heading in the direction of Alaric’s rooms.

I’m grateful and afraid all at once about that. Grateful, because it means I’m more protected than I would otherwise be against sudden attacks by Callus. Nervous, because I’m not sure how Alaric will react to me and Rowan showing up together at his door.

“I’ll never get used to this section of Ironhold,” Rowan says, as we head into the parts of Ironhold reserved for the noble gladiators. It’s easy to forget sometimes that he doesn’t spend as much time here as me. His friends are all the other enslaved gladiators, or at least those who entered the colosseum to avoid punishment for crimes. The nobles don’t care about him, and he certainly doesn’t spend his time hanging out with them.

This part of the fortress is different. There are still flickering torches, but there are also some stones that glow with magic to provide light. There are suites of rooms, rather than small, individual cells.

And there is the space that is a kind of gallery, filled with statues of gladiators of the past. Rowan wanders into it as we reach it, and I go with him, because I know I can’t go wandering off alone in this place.

“I haven't seen all this before,” Rowan says. “They really do seek to honor gladiators of the past.”

I nod. “The first time I came in here, Vex was here. He said it wasn't a place for me because I didn't know who any of the gladiators were. He knew all of them, of course.”

“What I mean is that all of the talk of honor and glory isn't just a cover to the nobles. They aren't saying that just so thatthey can justify throwing us in there. Some of them actually believe it. Even Vex, from what you're saying.”

“Alaric seems to believe it too,” I say.

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