Page 34 of Ironhold, Trial One

“It was pretty impressive,” Naia says, coming up to us.

“Not as impressive as being able to let someone all but kill you so you can get close to them,” I reply.

Naia looks pained by the thought of that. “It still hurts. I can heal myself, but I still feel the pain, and if I get it wrong, if it’s more than I can heal…”

“But you got it right today,” I say.

“And tomorrow, you will fight in a way that does not just rely on it,” Rowan says. “You will defeat your opponent and they will barely touch you.”

I know he's trying to give her confidence, but I'm not sure that Naia believes it. If she survives, her path through the colosseum is going to be grim.

A laugh comes from the other side of the practice space. Vex is there, along with Alaric, Ravenna, and a few others of the free gladiators. He slaps a large gladiator who goes by the name of Goliath on the shoulder.

“Listen to them. Congratulating themselves on surviving one day in the colosseum. Talking about their brilliance because they won through tricks. What good are those tricks going to do them tomorrow?”

“How about you focus on your own practice?” Rowan says.

“What is there left to practice?” Vex replies. “My bout went perfectly. A couple of criminals, dispatched with ease.”

I frown. I hadn't known that was a thing in the arena, but I guess I should have. After all, I saw three prisoners executed using beasts. But this means that Vex had an easy bout against people who probably weren't trained to fight. All he had to do was kill them in a way that would entertain the crowd sufficiently.

Could I do that, if they make me fight against such people? I'm not sure I could. The idea of killing another person is still… it feels wrong.

“Enough boasting about dispatching nobodies, Vex,” Alaric says. “We need to get back tomybout.”

He tells the story of it, detailing every thrust, every cut, every step. The others hang raptly on his words. Alaric holds back no detail in proclaiming his own brilliance, and it's almost enough for me to just ignore him, but he's also going into forensic detail on the parts he thinks he could improve. It's clear he's taking this seriously, striving to become better with every bout.

I try to think through what happened in my own fight in the same kind of detail. I think about the ways in which I dodged the Ironhide's attacks and the blows I tried that did not work. I think back to the moments when I was almost killed. But ultimately, there is only one thing I want to know from that fight:

How did I do it? How did I control the Ironhide?

I can remember the feeling of it, remember the sensation of reaching down deep into some hidden part of myself for the power. I can remember making a connection with the beast, feeling all that it felt, experiencing the world through its eyes. IthinkI can remember how I did it, but it also feels as though the knowledge is something fragile, which might be broken apart at any moment.

It is getting dark by the time our practice session is done. We head to the bathhouse first, then back to the barracks, seeking out our rooms. A few people don't seem to be done with their celebrations on surviving the first day. They have wine with them still, and a few are slipping into one another's rooms. I momentarily think of Rowan, but push that thought aside. Just because he is muscular and handsome doesn't mean I need to throw myself at him. Especially not now, when I know I will have another challenge just as great tomorrow.

I'm just heading into my room when I see Alaric approaching. That's a surprise because, like all the other free gladiators, he has rooms elsewhere in Ironhold.

“Alaric, what are you doing here?” I ask.

He looks me up and down. “Perhaps I couldn't stay away from your beauty.”

“I imagine it's almost as great as what you think of yourself,” I shoot back.

He laughs. “What woman could live up to that? Although, I’ll admit you come close.”

“High praise indeed. But if this is some clumsy attempt at seduction-”

“My seductions areneverclumsy,” Alaric insists. His expression grows more serious. “You need to be careful, Lyra.”

“Careful about what?” I ask. “You need to be more specific, Alaric. I mean, I’m going into another bout tomorrow.”

“That's one of the things you need to be careful about,” he says. “What you did today was impressive, but tomorrow you won't be fighting a beast. You will need to find another way to win. Just remember, even though it's you and another person in there, there are still animals around.”

“You're thinking about what happened with Vex,” I guess.

“And I'm not the only one,” Alaric says. “Vex now believes that you called the shadow cat to you deliberately. He has been known to hold a grudge.”

“I know he doesn’t like me.”

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