Page 17 of Bear Strength

So, now, I keep my money close, so close that I can see it whenever I feel the need to. And, if someone tries to rob me… well, they can try. I’m determined to protect what is mine, what I love, to the death.

Feeling a little stressed out, but surprisingly less than this morning, I drive home. The traffic is light, and for a brief moment, I can forget about everything that has been bearing down onto me, like the heaviest burden.

“Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn…” the radio sings, and I joyfully sing along.

“World serves its own needs, don’t mis-serve your own needs, speed it up a notch, speed, grunt, no, strength, the ladder starts to clatter with a fear of height, down, height, wire in a fire…”

I remember how Dom and I would dance to REM, back when I thought everything would be alright, no matter what. But, I finally realized that my wishful thinking can’t change someone. It can’t change the outcome that is inevitable.

I turn into our street, and the sight before me makes me as mad as a hornet. A dark, shiny Harley bike rests in my yard, and I know what that means. He’s in my house. Alone with Dominick.

I step on the gas and park like a madman, straight in front. I rush out of the car, almost forgetting to lock it. Breathless, I slam the door open, expecting to see, I don’t know what. Blood? Mayhem? No one? But, I see none of that.

Dominick is in the living room, sitting on the floor. Mason sits a little above him, on the sofa. His hands are resting in his lap, holding a joystick. They’re playing PS. The sound of gunshots and people shouting is heard from the TV. They both look over at me.

The look on their face is one of puzzlement. I probably look like a mess. My cheeks are blushing, I can feel the heat rising from somewhere deep inside of me. The keys jangle in my hands, breaking the silence.

“Oh, hey mom,” Dominick greets me casually.

Mason just grins. He knows what he did. Oh yes. He must know. After we agreed on this, he still goes ahead and does whatever he wants.

“What is the meaning of this?” These are the only words that manage to form an actual thought inside my mind.

I stare Mason down, but instead of looking away, he locks his eyes with mine. They look like the blue lagoon, the deepest hue of cerulean. You want to dive into those eyes, you want them to envelop you from all sides, you want to see only azure around you and never wake up.

“We finished earlier,” Dominick explains, wondering why I look so upset.

“Didn’t I tell you to call me when you’re done?” I ask, trying to sound calm, but I’m boiling inside.

I don’t want my boy to spend more time with these people than necessary. Why is this man even in my house now? Who invited him in?

“I offered to call you,” Mason suddenly interferes, with the voice of a psychologist who seems to know exactly what’s wrong with you and how to cure you. Condescending. “But, apparently you’re the only living person who doesn’t own a cell phone.”

He looks over at Dominick, and they both exchange a smile. This enrages me. Who the Hell does he think he is, lecturing me on how I lead my life? But, I can’t get upset. These men are dangerous, and they have my son two days a week for God knows how long. I need to stay calm. The last thing I should do was argue with any of them.

“We don’t have a cell phone, yes,” I confirm. “I told Dominick to call me at the diner.”

“I did call you,” Dominick shoots his reply at me. “No one was picking up.”

That catches me off guard. I try to remember if I heard the phone ring, but I can’t. It’s possible, though. I can’t be sure. Mason nods, in cahoots with my son.

“I drove really slowly,” Mason grins. “Ask him.”

“Yeah, mom, he really did,” Dominick assures me. As if that will change my mind about anything.

“At least that,” I mumble, more to myself than to them.

“Why don’t you join us?” Mason suddenly asks me, patting the empty place next to him on the sofa.

My blood reaches the point of boiling, and I feel hot in my own skin. Losing my clothes wouldn’t help even if I tried it. I blush even more, and I feel weak in the knees. I have no idea why this man’s presence is making me feel this way. Sure, he’s handsome, but in that I-know-you-want-me way, and I hate that. Always did.

“Um, I… I can’t,” I manage to muster, taking a step back. “I need to get back to the diner. You need me to leave you some money for pizza?” I ask Dominick.

“I already ate,” he informs me. “We ordered a pizza before Mason brought me home.”

“Well... “ I glance at Mason. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do that.”

“You’ve got a really hard working boy here, Danica,” he replies, his voice sweet as honey, and for a moment, I almost think he’s going to ask something of me, a favor of some sort. But, he doesn’t. “You don’t think I’d leave him hungry, do you?”

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