Page 51 of Not A Chance

I wish I could say the following week was filled with more nights like our first, but that was sadly not the case.

After the sex that may or may not have redefined my understanding of pleasure, I’d purposefully taken our banter back to a playful place. The connection I’d felt with Theo in those moments had hit me too strongly to stay cuddled up with him a moment longer. If I wanted to keep this liaison with Theo compartmentalized as strictly a hookup, I couldn’t afford to sink back into the ill-advised crush from my teenage years.

His version of help to clean up had been more making out and touching every inch of each other’s skin we could reach. Eventually, I’d kicked him out to actually get clean.

By the time I’d returned to my room, Theo had passed out smack-dab in the middle of the bed. An uninvited warmth invaded my chest as I stood and watched him.

He looked so content, not to mention unreasonably sexy, that I couldn’t bring myself to wake him.

I’d allowed myself one night where I didn’t look too deeply at my reasons for crawling onto the sliver of mattress he wasn’t occupying and covered us both with my comforter. The warmth of his body was soothing, even though my mind raced.

I’d spent the hours before dawn reminding myself why it couldn’t work between us.

We were just enjoying each other while I was in Toronto. I was leaving again in a matter of months, and Theo had a contract here. It was just sex, albeit incredible sex, and that’s all it could ever be.

I had plans to do some good for the people of the city I’d come to love. And even the gorgeous Theo Yao-Miller wasn’t going to get in the way of that.

So by the time he woke beside me the next morning, I’d steeled myself enough to keep him at a distance. I’d sent him off to his usual morning workout with a bright smile.

That had been five days ago. The Tempests had been away for a couple of games, and we’d only exchanged a couple of texts between us in my continued effort to keep this thing out of relationship territory.

If we had a repeat of our night together, great. If it was a one-night thing, then that was fine too. I’d tell Theo the same. I was only after some simple and string-free fun.

Right, sure. Okay. Do you think you can lie to yourself so well that you might believe it?

Today was the sixth day of not seeing Theo and saw me waking up with a monster of a cold. I could admit, privately, that I hadn’t been taking the best care of myself.

Breakfast was often slept through or neglected because mornings were the only time I got any decent sleep. When not desperate for an extra couple hours of sleep after rushing around behind the scenes at the Tempestsgames, I used the time while Giz would contentedlysleep on the couch for her routine lazy morning nap to research the endless forms and documentation I would need to start up a nonprofit. Just when I thought I’d gotten a handle on one part of the process, I’d read an article or blog about another start-up that revealed a set of regulations that I’d never considered.

Now, I was paying the price for letting stress reign supreme over my decisions.

My eyes felt gritty and glued together as I threw on whatever hoodie I’d haphazardly chucked on the couch in one of my fits of feeling overheated through the evening last night.

I was firmly in the can’t-put-on-enough-blankets-to-get-warm stage phase this morning.

All the same, Giz needed a quick walk around the block. Potty time waited for no virus.

I made it down in the elevator, feeling light-headed from either the cold or sinus medicine I was using to combat some of my symptoms.

The brisk late autumn air made me cough as I followed Gizmo out the front door of the building.

I was leaning on the skinny tree in front of our building, grateful that Giz was a girl and I wouldn’t be risking a potty splash zone while I let her sniff the small patch of scrubby dirt next to me.

“We have to stop meeting like this.”

The rough timbre of Theo’s voice floated over from somewhere behind me. I was too goddamn miserable to even be taken by surprise.

I admit that I wasn’t the best patient when sick. I was used to handling this kind of stuff on my own by just staying away from everyone until I was better.

“Indie?” Theo tried again.

“Hey,” I croaked. My voice was rough from disuse. I hated the sore throat portion of a cold.

I turned and saw Theo looking at me with an expression full of concern.

A glance down at Giz had her giving me some solid side-eye for not paying attention to the fact that she was done outside.

I waved my hand again in dismissal of my plight.

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