Page 70 of Back On Ice

“Good.” His shoulders sag in visible relief. “You… you have to know, I’ve never seen myself living my life with anyone else but you.”

My heart flutters. Could it be that he would stay and behappyabout it?

“But,” he continues, looking down, “I have to tell you something?—”

All thoughts of the little speech I practiced go out the window. They fly away, leaving only two words in their wake. My mouth opens before I can stop myself and the words spill from my throat like ill-timed word-vomit.

“I’m pregnant.”

His eyes widen, and his face stills.

His mouth gapes open, then closes, and then opens again, but no sound escapes him.

Dammit. That was… less than ideal. But moments pass, and he just continues to stare at me. What is he thinking? I know I wasn’t eloquent with how I told him, but is he going tosaysomething? Ask me how this happened? Or how long I’ve known? How we're going to make this work?

Unshed tears sting my eyes, as the seconds tick by, the heavy feeling of rejection settling over my bones like lead. This is Carter. We’re supposed to be a team. I had practiced telling him he had a choice, but I don’t think I thought he wouldn’t want to be there. I have no contingency plan for if he leaves. If he rejects both me and his unborn child.

His eyes look at my face like he’s expecting me to laugh and tell him it’s a joke. Based on his reaction, I’m tempted to. At my silence, his expression morphs to one of devastation, fear almost. I need to say something, I know I do. But all I can do is stand there, trying to keep the tears at bay as I wait for him to say something.

Anything.

Blame me. Yell at me. Ask me how I could be so irresponsible. I’ll take anything at this point if it fills the void of the silence that stretches between us. He says nothing, my lip wobbling and him frozen in place, staring at me in what I can only describe now as horror.

“Carter?” I choke out quietly. “I know it’s a shock, but—” Before I can finish my sentence, and, without a single sound, he turns and walks out the door, the bell ringing in what feels like a mockery of the situation. A highlighted sound to let me know, “This is the exact moment everything went to hell”.

My heart shatters.

What I feel now is a hundred times worse than what I had felt when I saw the texts from Nicole. At least then he had still been trying to explain. Right now, I am utterly alone.

He left. Again.

This time, he can’t blame it on his Dad, or circumstances outside his control. He looked me straight in the eyes and walked away.

When I hear his car start and the tires squeal out of the parking lot, my feet carry me as fast as they can to the door. I twist the lock before turning around and dropping to the floor, sobbing into my knees.

I can’t stay here. Carter’s face is a tattoo in my mind, staring at me in shock and disbelief. But I am not in any condition to drive right now either.

Hiccuping between sobs, I pull my phone out and dial Abbie’s number. “Hey Soph, what’s—” she cuts off when another guttural cry leaves me. “Holy shit, what’s wrong? Are you okay? Where are you?”

“At shop…”hiccup,“told Carter…”hiccup,“about baby…”hiccup,“he left!” I finally get out, rubbing my face to wipe the snot away from my nose.

“Oh, fuck no,” Abbie spits, “You just hold on, Sophie. I’m coming to get you. That asshole thinks he can just leave? Uh uh. I’m on my way babe, I’ll be right there.”

She stays on the phone with me the entire time, my sniffling and hiccuping the only sound as she makes the short drive from her house to the flower shop.

Knocking on the door sometime later lets me know she’s here. Abbie waits while I stand up and unlock it, then sweeps me into a bracing hug.

“He’s an asshole if he thinks that’s the right move,” Abbie says as she holds me close.

“He didn’t sayanything. He just stared at me like I was an alien or something for like three minutes before turning around and leaving.”

“Hmm.” Abbie lets go of me, only to grab my purse and turn off the shop lights. “That doesn’t really sound like Carter. It’s possible he was just in shock and reacted poorly.” She ushers me out the door and digs my keys out my purse, locking the shop up for me.

Shit. I am so lucky to have a friend like her.

My head shakes in disagreement. “You didn’t see him, Abbie. He looked… like… I don’t even know. Like I just gave him the worst news possible.” Which, okay, fair enough. I didn’t exactly have the best reaction when I found out either. But to just leave? Without a word? Deep down, I never saw this as a possible outcome. Where do I go from here? Do I wait and see if he comes around? Do I accept that he’s not going to be a part of our lives and move on?

“We’ll figure it out, Soph. With or without Carter.” Abbie unlocks her car and I climb into the front seat, immediately pulling some tissues from the center console.