Page 20 of Relief Pitcher

CHAPTER11

COOPER

With Tyler softly snoring, I carefully extricated myself from the bed without waking him from his post-orgasm snooze. I’d tried falling asleep, but I couldn’t do it. There was too much on my mind. Thoughts had crowded in, taking up all the space as soon as the blissful haze cleared. Sharing the bed with him last night had been a kindness, but doing it now would be intimate in a way I craved too much. I couldn’t do that to myself.

I needed to think. I needed to go to my spot, weather be damned. On my way out, I passed the folded pile of Tyler’s clothes with his panties on top. The memory of discovering him naked underneath my pajama pants sent fire racing through my veins. He might not want to free-ball it in jeans back to his place. I could at least wash his clothes so he was comfortable later. Underwear like that probably couldn’t go into the washing machine. I quickly googled and learned how to hand-wash them. It only took a few minutes before I had them drying by a heat vent. As soon as I did it, I panicked. Washing his underwear was weird.Shit. I need to get myself sorted.

Definitely time for a visit to my spot. I was already liking the guy enough to want to make sure he was comfortable in his underwear on the drive home.

I bundled in my rain gear and walked through the trees to the creek where I often went to feel close to Aleck. While walking, I texted Danita to let her know I’d survived the storm, hoping to cut her off from an impromptu visit while Tyler was here.

I sat on the stump from a dying tree I’d cut for one of my pieces as I watched the creek flow more like a river after the storm. I’d carved the stump into a throne for Aleck because of how much time he’d spent out here. Good thing I’d made it comfortable since I’d taken up residence there after he passed. I loved being able to give new life to dying trees. Aleck always called me a softie.

Rain dripped from the bill of my hood as I rubbed my palms on my thighs. Some times more than others, it was tough to start conversations with him. Sucking the dick of a guy surely qualified as a legit tough conversation. But even on the harder days, I always felt better after I did.

“I bet you’re jealous from wherever you are. You probably watched this morning and got a good show, huh?” I chuckled. It sounded rusty. “Don’t make a habit of watching, you perv.”

I could almost hear Aleck’s laughter while telling me he was my favorite perv. He’d never been wrong about that. I relaxed into the conversation, grateful I could talk to him without sobbing these days. I spoke not like he was the husband I still had—I understood he was gone, and he wouldn’t want me to stop my life to pine for him—but he’d been my best friend. The person I’d cared about most in the world. So I tried to talk to him like I would my best friend.

“I’m thinking about dating again. Can you imagine? My skills have gotten rusty since college. If you had your way, I would’ve brought a date to your funeral. But I always moved slower than you. You just had to race me to the afterlife, didn’t you?”

The sharp shrill of a crow’s call pierced the wind rustling the surrounding branches. I closed my eyes and swallowed the lump in my throat. The crows had become my company in my loneliest moments, but I should have expected nothing less with how much Aleck had loved those things.

Once I lost feeling in my face from the whipping wind, I walked back to the house. I wanted more time with Tyler but wasn’t deluded enough to expect anything from our brief time together. He’d made it clear he wasn’t interested in anything more than some fun and, frankly, sexual charity. Despite how well we got along and my wanting to know more about the enigma of a man who secretly watched Hallmark movies, said the goofiest things, was great in bed, and loved to wear lacy panties, I needed to be grateful to him for helping me through a tough spot. He’d gotten me over the initial hurdle of being with someone new without Aleck there.

Rain dripped down my hood while the wind pushed it into my face as I walked back. I’d expected more internal struggle when I’d practically dragged Tyler to my bedroom, but I supposed my dick overrode my brain. When I’d let myself imagine having sex with some faceless stranger before, I had worried about being unable to keep it up or sobbing in the middle of it when I saw someone other than Aleck. That hadn’t happened with Tyler. He’d completely consumed me and kept me fully immersed in the moment.

Maybe I wasn’t beyond repair after all.

I reached the shed I used as my studio and unlocked it to grab a chainsaw. My mind wandered to him sleeping in my bed as I hovered in the doorway, staring at the chainsaw, knowing I needed to cut down the tree and give him the freedom to leave. But I wanted a little more time with him. Just a tiny bit more. Enough for another orgasm?

The irrational part of my brain won and had me shutting and locking the door. I could test the waters. I wasn’t a kidnapper or the forest-dwelling creep he joked about, but I was acting impulsively. Needing to stay in the bubble longer.

When I reached the house, I removed my rain gear and quietly moved to the bedroom in case Tyler was still sleeping. I found him lying on his side in bed, blanket around his waist, bare chest on display, as he swiped his phone screen. I took the moment to watch him before he realized I was there. Only a moment because, again,notcreepy.

When Aleck and I had had the occasional threesome, part of the rules we’d set for ourselves was that we’d never bring someone back to our home. This had been our space. So we’d always gone to hotels or the other person’s house.

Seeing Tyler there did something funny to my insides. How could a guy have me so wrecked in less than a day?

He looked up and smiled. Deep lines formed around his eyes. The marks of a man who smiled often.

“How is it outside?” he asked.

“Wet and windy, but better than yesterday.”

We stared at each other, neither of us mentioning being stranded. I hoped he wanted to stay longer, but I needed to gauge the situation, so I lied. Ineverlied. It was a white lie—still, I didn’t know what came over me.

“There’s an issue with my chainsaw. I’ll need to spend some time working on it.” I paused and waited for Tyler to look disappointed, but he smiled and seemed to bite the inside of his cheek. “I could ask that friend to swing by with one now or…”

“Or you could work on it later or tomorrow?”

I grinned. “I could definitely do that.”

“Aw, shucks. How are we going to fill the time?” He tossed his phone on the bed and patted the space next to him.

There was nothing sexy about the way I hurled myself onto the bed, but the way Tyler’s laughter filled the room made me feel like I could do no wrong.

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