Page 17 of Perfect Blend

Bricker: No shame in that. You’ll know when you’re ready. It’s barely been a year, Jack. There’s no timeline.

Bricker: Or you’ll meet someone who sweeps you off your feet, and you’ll have no choice but to go along for the ride.

JavaJackOfAllTrades: Didn’t peg you for a romantic.

Bricker: Not in real life. But on here? Maybe a little bit.

JavaJackOfAllTrades: Sap.

Bricker: Lol, fuck you.

Bricker: I’d better get going. You going to be okay?

JavaJackOfAllTrades: Yup! Feeling better now. As always, thanks for being there.

Bricker: Always. Enjoy your night.

JavaJackOfAllTrades: You too.

- - -

I droppedmy phone onto the couch next to me. Talking with Bricker always made me feel better about my situation, but guilt nagged me for not telling him about the drag show. I knew he would’ve encouraged me to tell Travis to fuck off and do my own number. Talking to Mikey earlier had helped release the pressure valve.

If not for joining that Discord group, I wasn’t sure how I would’ve fared after divorcing Travis. I’d worked hard to make Dahlia Springs my home and felt like I’d truly become part of the community. But divorcing him had left me feeling like I might alienate some of the major players in town. I loved the town and my business too much to risk cutting Travis from my life completely. Not to mention the friends I’d made over the years. But maybe I’d been overthinking it? When it came to matters of Travis, I always felt off-kilter. Not in the way I felt with Mikey. It was like a tilt-a-whirl with Mikey—laughter and joy. Travis left me disoriented.

Mikey would be over soon, and I needed to get ready. I went to my guest bedroom and began pulling things out for our drag performance planning meeting. Appointment? Hang out? Whatever. Mikey was about to be in my home. I’d dreamed of that so often in high school.A study date with Mikey where he came to my house while my parents were at work, me “forgetting” he was coming over and answering the door in a towel.For a fleeting moment, I considered the merits of doing exactly that.

As I prepared my small drag collection, I wondered what Bricker was doing for his work trip. Sometimes—more and more of the time lately—I regretted establishing such firm anonymity boundaries with him when we began DMing last year.

It’d been what I needed at the time. No names, locations, jobs, or other identifying details. Beyond the fuzzy demographics, I knewa lotabout his relationship with his ex-husband and how he felt about it. He knew damn near everything about mine too. The anonymity made me feel safe to finally share things I couldn’t with anyone in my actual life. I knew Icouldtrust my best friend, Bailey, but with his family being so close to Travis’s, it was easier not to put him in the middle of anything.

Bricker was an important part of my actual lifeanddigital one, with how often we talked and the intensity with which I relied on him. Did his name and location really matter when I knew about his dreams, fears, and traumas? So much about him was likable that sometimes, particularly while lying in bed alone at night, I wondered if we would also hit it off in person.

Instead of wandering further into that dangerous territory, I focused on my tangible world and the man about to be in my home. I pulled out two plastic tubs tucked back in the guest room closet and unpacked everything onto the bed. Dresses, wigs, shoes, accessories, and props from years of Dahlia Springs Pride drag shows. I’d ended up with random pieces from others who’d donated them to me after their performances on top of my and Travis’s stuff. I’d become the keeper of the town’s annual drag celebration, and I loved it.

As I finished lining up the wigs across the dresser, there was a knock at my front door. My stomach fluttered when I saw Mikey’s distorted shape through the frosted-glass window.

I rolled my shoulders and opened the door.

He looked great in his snug black jeans that hugged his thick thighs and calves. A mid-wash denim button-up was tucked into the jeans with his sleeves rolled up and a narrow brown belt encircled his waist. I wasn’t sure if I should read into the fact that he’d changed into something nicer than what I’d seen him in earlier. Had he changed for the same reason I had?

“Hey. Come on in.”

The wide smile Mikey greeted me with held a tinge of something else. He was always quick to smile, but there was something different. Warmth. Excitement.Interest.

I licked my suddenly dry lips.

“This is a great place.” He stepped into my small living room and looked around.

“It’s not much, but it works. I spend most of my time at the coffee shop.” I’d been lucky to find the modest two-bedroom cottage. A benefit of running one of the most high-traffic businesses in town was people were quick to help if they knew you needed it. Mabel had hooked me up with someone who’d moved to Portland for work but wanted to keep the cottage as a rental property. It was less than what I’d been paying toward my and Travis’s mortgage for the overpriced home he’d wanted in the nicer part of town.

“This is basically a mansion compared to my Seattle studio.” He studied my books.

“I bet your studio costs more than this does too.”

He laughed. “I don’t think I want to find out. I like it there, but sometimes I wonder why I live somewhere so expensive. I can’t ever save enough to travel or splurge on anything.”

“That’s tough.” I walked over to grab a wine bottle. “At least you live in a place with more than a half dozen types of cuisine,” I teased.

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