That’s the first time someone has called me weird in a way that sounded like they were calling me beautiful.I wanted him to do it again.
It astounded me how wrong I’d been about Skylar. Before we’d officially met, I’d assumed he was like the popular guys I’d watched from afar in high school and college—gorgeous, athletic, cool, dressed great, funny, loved by everyone. Guys who only paid attention to me if they wanted homework help or to tease me in a way that left me feeling raw. Skylar was so much more.
I’d spent years wishing people would look beyond my social awkwardness and bad fashion sense to see the real me, but I hadn’t given Skylar the same courtesy.
“You okay?” Skylar gently gripped my forearm.
I nodded. “Yeah, sorry. My mind wandered for a bit.”
“Care to share with the class?” He released my arm and popped a piece of dick donut shaft in his mouth.
I had the sudden urge to lick the cream from a donut ball but refrained. That was miles more forward than me.Says the guy who mutually jerked off with the guy sitting next to you.But that was through two windows and on opposite sides of a courtyard. It was impossible to be brave while sharing a couch with him.
If I wasn’t brave enough to attempt seduction—because we shouldn’t fool around, anyway—maybe I could practice being honest and direct. I felt safe with Skylar for whatever reason and knew he wouldn’t hold anything against me.
“I was thinking about how I misjudged you.”
Skylar raised an eyebrow and slowed his chewing, but he didn’t say anything.
“I made judgments based on how hot you are, and that wasn’t fair of me.”
His lips twisted into a devilish smirk, which made me realize what I’d said.
“Anyway,” I said too loudly in my small apartment. “There’s much more to you than I thought.” I shoved the rest of the donut pieces into my mouth to stop the word vomit.
Skylar shifted on my couch, pulling his knee up so he could face me more directly. “Thanks for saying that. People are quick to judge me as some sort of frat bro or finance guy with no depth. Not that frat bros and finance guys lack depth, but you know what I mean.”
I grinned and nodded. He was adorable when he rambled.
He looked over at my bookshelf. “I’m a bit of a geek, actually.”
I knew it!“You might be shocked by this, so prepare yourself, but I am too.”
Skylar gave my shirt a pointed look. “This is my shocked face, J.”
J. Huh. I like that.I’d never had a nickname before. “Tell me about your geek street cred, then.”
He squirmed a little. “This may be more nerd than geek. I don’t know. I’m not up on proper classification, but I’m a huge fan of sci-fi. I’m readingCatwingsright now.”
My jaw dropped. “You’re reading Ursula K. Le Guin?” I glanced at my small collection of favorite Le Guin novels.
“Whenever I’m in a new city, I try to read books by authors from there. Bonus if they’re sci-fi.” He pulled out his phone and tapped the screen a couple of times, then handed it to me.
His Kindle app. Momentarily dumbfounded by the fact he’d so openly handed me his phone, which was something my exes wouldneverdo, I scrolled. We had several of the same books. I gaped at him.
Once I regained the power of speech, I handed his phone back. “It’s clear you have impeccable taste,” I said, ignoring his knowing look.
“I do.” He glanced down my body, and I felt it all over.
It tested each of my limits not to climb on his lap, but that wasn’t what we were doing. We were becoming friends not fuck buddies.
We talked about our favorite books as we finished the donuts. I thought it was disgustingly endearing that he tried to sign up for a library card whenever he visited a place for longer than a month. There may have been swooning. He said he loved the feel of physical books but couldn’t justify buying them with how often he traveled. I told him he could read any of mine while he was in town, and it made me giddy when he got up to carefully study my bookshelf and select one.
It made me sad he couldn’t keep books the way he wanted. I imagined him in a gorgeous home where he’d knocked out a wall between two bedrooms to build an immaculate library—worn leather chair, green library lamp, and shelf ladder, obviously.
Will he ever settle down?He didn’t seem in a hurry to do so, but based on the conversations we’d had during our hangouts, he didn’t sound like he loved traveling as much as he used to. As he told me stories about the cities he’d lived in, he lit up, but there was an undercurrent of weariness to it.
Skylar seemed like someone who wanted to settle somewhere but was too scared to stop moving. Just like I wanted to travel and explore but was too scared to start moving. Perhaps we envied each other a little.