Page 66 of Sweet Escape

“In some ways, it was. Like the fact that they never came to any of my performances growing up because they were alwaysso busy,” she says, drawing out the last two words with all the sarcasm she can muster. I can practically see her rolling her eyes. “But I had a lot of freedom. And I think that’s what helped me figure out who I am. Otherwise, I would have just been shrouded in their version of what life is supposed to look like.”

I nod even though she can’t see me.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to info dump,” she says, laughing lightly. “What Imeantto say is that my parents don’t care about how I feel. I’m just wondering if your dad might respond differently. If you talked to him.”

“Ididsay something. This morning, actually. It didn’t go well.”

She makes a humming noise again. “Not everyone is ready to be confronted with the truth behind the mistakes they’ve made.”

I let out a humorless chuckle. “Ain’t that the truth.”

“I’m sorry you’re dealing with that. I hope you know that his reaction is more about him and how he feels than it is about you. Murphy had plenty to say on that subject before she moved home, but after she moved back, she made it clear that as infuriating as he could be, her big brother was a great guy.”

My lips turn up at the sentiment. “You’ve known this whole time what a great guy I am, and youstillgave me grief when we first met?”

She laughs. “I’m a loyal guard dog, okay? And Murphy’s my girl.”

“Yeah, I’m just giving you a hard time.” I sigh, sitting up in my chair, knowing I need to get back to the paperwork in front of me. “Well, I’m glad you’re doing all right.”

“Thanks for calling to check in.”

I wish her a good night, we say our goodbyes, and I finally hang up the phone.

I don’t know what I was expecting when I called Vivian, but something in my chest is lighter now that we’ve talked.

It’s unfamiliar, this ever-present, subconscious desire to check in with her. To connect. To see how she is and what she’s doing.

Somehow, despite all my best efforts, Vivian Walsh is continuing to burrow her way into my life and under my skin.

And I can’t help but wonder how hollow it will feel when she’s gone.

Chapter Fourteen

Vivian

Even after the complete disaster that was Theo showing up in Rosewood unannounced and unwelcome, I’m still spending long days writing music. My muse is still speaking to me. My time here so far has proven that my emotions—about both MemphisandTheo—need to be put onto the page.

I finish one of the songs I was working on. I still need to figure out a bridge for the second, and I’m feeling inspired enough to start a third.

Sure, there’s always the possibility that none of these will be what my manager or my label is looking for. But something inside me says they’re going to love what I have.

What’s coming out of me right now is raw. And painful. Like I’m bleeding onto the pages in a way I didn’t know I could.

And that’s saying something.

The songs aren’taboutMemphis, exactly. Or even about the sex.

They’re about the kind of feelings that being with him evokes within me.

The one in front of me now that I’m tentatively calling “Safe for my Soul”... It’s slow, acoustic, heartbreak on the page. About desperately seeking a place to be yourself. About never feeling right.

I’ve known Memphis for a very short time. There’s no way I see him as that safe place. But that feeling of safety ... of knowing that I don’t have to temper myself with him the way I’ve had to with men in the past ... that I could sit next to him in the back of that truck and share the truth about what I’m going through ... It’s definitely an inspiration for the words I have on the page, for the melody and tempo of the song.

It reminds me of him.

It probably always will.

I work on that song at an almost frantic pace, the words pouring out of me to create a splashy mess on the page, the melody a clear and true thing in my mind, as if it’s a song that already exists.

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