Page 44 of Embracing Hope

“Should I start taking applications?” she teased.

“Every crew member might want you, but no one would know what to do with you once they have you.”

She absorbed his words. “What do you mean?”

“Okay, Chatty Cathy. I’m saying you need someone who isn’t going to melt every time you flash those baby blues in his direction. Or show a little leg. You need a man. A real man who can stand up to you. Who wants more than that sweet body.”

“And you’re not that man?”

“You fishing?”

“Yes.”

“The more I get to know you, the more I think I might be the only man.”

She quivered in delight. “I do like a man with confidence.”

“It’s not that simple, Hope. I can be difficult. I suffer from PTSD and struggle with sleep. Sometimes, I distance myself from others because I crave solitude. I know that’s unfair to those around me, especially someone I want to keep safe.”

“Two people who love each other keep each other safe, through the good and bad.”

“I’m damaged, Hope. I’m not saying I’m a lost cause, but I’m a bit disoriented regarding emotions.”

She placed her hand on his cheek, sensing that his eyes were open in the darkness, though he remained silent. She felt the tension in his jaw beneath her touch. “You haven’t discovered the right person yet. She will be strong enough to face challenges with you, serving as your anchor during turbulent times and holding you close when nightmares come. You’re not damaged, Isaac. You are a good, caring man.”

“You’re awfully hopeful, sweetheart.”

The clock on the nightstand ticked loudly.

“What if I fail you like all those women and children?” His voice was low and raw.

“And what if you don’t? What if you find happiness, and she helps to release those demons clinging to your doubt?”

“Hope…”

“Isaac, it's all right to let someone in. Love is truly wonderful. Many of us desire to find our special person.”

He laid his hand on her hip, gently squeezing. “You can’t imagine how much I’ve suffered. That day…the bomb. The darkness. The pain. The loss. It all plays on a reel inside my head. If I had just taken the shot—”

“Shh. It’s time you stop being the judge and jury at your trial. The terrorist. He’s the guilty one. It's just like the man who broke in tonight. That’s like saying if I hadn’t come downstairs, I could have prevented what happened to me.”

After a long pause, he said, “You should know I want you. Very much so.”

She smiled but knew he couldn’t see the expression. “Well, that’s good to know. A woman doesn’t like to feel rejected. I’ve practically thrown myself at you.”

“It was never rejection, and you know that, right? I feel obligated to tell you that when CJ learns about Sam’s illness, he might want to pull out of the merger.”

“What about you, Isaac? Do you still think Marcum Livestock should pull out?”

She could practically hear his brain churning.

“I must admit, since I’ve been here, my mind has changed a bit.”

“I knew it would,” she felt a wave of excitement.

“Slow your roll, sweetheart. I said a bit. There are still some issues I need to work through to know if it will be a good fit for both parties. I’ll need to sit down with Sam.”

“And tell him that I told you about his cancer?”

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