Page 79 of Fourth Wall

"Don't be ridiculous.” I laughed, shaking my head, and got off the bed, giving him a small pat on the chest before heading into the bathroom.

"Can you call my mom and ask if she can watch the girls while we go over to Tyler's tomorrow? I don't want them to wake up and hear anything, so I think it's best to go over there. I alsothink it’s best if we go after we have figured out a plan. We can do all of it tomorrow and have Julian, Alex, Elio, and the girls all weigh in," I requested, seeking some privacy to talk.

Christian nodded, and I quickly shut the bathroom door, getting ready for bed. The idea of marriage felt ridiculous, and everything was moving so fast that it felt like I had accidentally hit the fast-forward button.

I shook my head again, realizing how hasty this was. The thought of getting married again, especially so soon, seemed foolish. I had a family to consider, and my primary concern was the well-being of the girls.

As I contemplated the situation, doubts and uncertainties crept in. It was difficult to fathom the idea of being married again, given our past experiences. I needed to weigh the consequences and consider what this step would mean for all of us. The decision couldn't be taken lightly, and I knew I had to carefully consider every aspect before taking such a momentous leap. At least I think I had to, right?

I grabbed my toothbrush and added some toothpaste to it before placing it into my mouth. Immediately, the taste of mint made me want to gag. This was new…

Or wait. I swear I had the same reaction to toothpaste twice in my entire life. Once when I was pregnant with Kinsley, and the second time with Kelsie.

As if the gears had all suddenly started to click—the vomiting, exhaustion, and enhanced smell. There was no fucking way this was happening on top of literally everything else.

I opened the very last drawer and grabbed a very old pregnancy test. It was likely expired at this point, but I had stockpiled a bunch when I was married, convincing myself I would be pregnant again.

My hands shook as I opened the box quietly. I heard Christian calling my mom on the other side, so I did this as quickly aspossible. I didn’t want to stress him out if this was just my imagination, which it absolutely had to be.

With trembling hands, I retrieved the pregnancy test from the box and quickly followed the instructions, all the while hoping that this was just a product of my overactive imagination. There was no way this could be happening, not now, not after the news the lawyer had delivered today.

As the test developed, I held my breath, my heart pounding in my chest. I glanced at the small window on the stick, and my eyes widened in disbelief. A second pink line appeared, clear as day. I blinked, thinking it might be a mistake, but it was undeniable. I was pregnant.

A surge of emotions rushed through me—shock, disbelief, and even a hint of fear. This was unexpected. I mean, technically, it could have been a possibility since we never used condoms, and I wasn’t on birth control. I guess I just assumed…? I didn’t know what the fuck I assumed. I had two fucking kids already. I knew very well how one got pregnant. I just didn't know how to process this news, especially with everything else happening in our lives.

I desperately wanted to share this moment with Christian but couldn't, not after what he had just heard from the lawyer. He didn't need any additional stress right now, and I couldn't risk adding to his burden. I needed time to wrap my head around this revelation before I could find the right moment to share the news with him.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I sat there in the bathroom, feeling an overwhelming mix of emotions. I had to be strong, not just for myself but for the girls and Christian. This was a lot to handle, and I knew I had to find a way to navigate through it all without breaking down.

Once I composed myself, I quietly disposed of the test and washed my hands. Taking a deep breath, I exited the bathroom,my mind racing with a million thoughts. Christian was still on the phone with my mom, discussing the arrangements for the girls. I stood in the room with him, listening to them talking on speakerphone.

"I've got it handled. We will see you guys tomorrow after work," my mom said, and Christian thanked her before hanging up.

I forced a smile, pretending everything was fine even though I felt like my world had been turned upside down. "Thanks for calling her," I said, trying to keep my voice steady.

Christian wrapped his arms around me, sensing that something was off. "Everything okay, firecracker?" he asked, concern evident in his eyes.

I nodded, trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill. "Yeah, just a bit tired. I think I'm going to head to bed early tonight."

He kissed my forehead gently. "You take all the rest you need. We can talk about our plan with everyone tomorrow."

As Christian walked away, guilt gnawed at me. I wanted desperately to tell him about the pregnancy, but the weight of everything that had happened today was crushing enough. I couldn't bear to burden him further with this unexpected news. It had to wait even though I had no idea when the "right time" would be.

Turning to head into my room, I realized how cold and desolate the space had become, a place I had avoided except for grabbing clothes from the dresser. But Christian hesitated, sensing my distress, and turned toward me, questioning my intentions.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked, trying to decipher my emotions. I attempted to force a smile, feigning composure. "I just need... some space after everything," I replied, not wanting to reveal my true turmoil.

"I don't like the sound of that," he admitted, and with those words, my resolve crumbled. Tears welled up, and I couldn't hold back any longer. The weight of it all became too much, and I cried uncontrollably, my body heaving with exhaustion and the burden on my shoulders.

Christian quickly crossed the bathroom and wrapped me in his arms, bringing me comfort and stillness. "What’s going on, firecracker?" he asked, his voice filled with concern.

"Just today has been such a wild... curveball. I just need my rest," I reiterated, hoping he would understand and leave me alone.

"Can I come with you?" he whispered, almost begging me. "Let me try to lay with you."

Still crying, I nodded in agreement, unable to resist his plea. He turned me around and led us back into his bedroom, tucking me under the covers and holding me tightly from behind.

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end," he whispered gently. With those words, I closed my eyes, hoping that this would all be revealed as a terrifying dream when I woke up tomorrow.

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