Page 71 of Fourth Wall

“You mean so much to me.” I officially felt myself melt into a puddle.

34

Christian

We spent that week fucking each other until I didn’t think I had it in me to keep going, but we just kept at it because I was absolutely and utterly addicted to Maeve.

The next week passed, and Maeve let me pick the girls up from school before leaving for my Tuesday morning trip.

Waking up to Maeve in my bed was also something that I was addicted to. The way her hair splayed out on the pillows, the way she whimpered just as she fell into a deep sleep, and the way she curled her body around mine.

It was early in the morning, and I gave her a small kiss on the forehead before heading into the girls’ rooms and doing the same.

“Fuck, my phone,” I grumbled as I had made it down the steps to the car. I quickly ran back upstairs, grabbed my real phone from the nightstand, and confirmed I had the burner safely tucked away in my pocket.

“One more kiss,” I whispered to no one in particular and pressed my lips upon hers.

“Mmm, Christian?” she dreamily asked.

“I’m leaving. I’ll be home tonight,” I promised.

“Okay. I love you.” She shifted in her sleep so she was now facing away from me.

She…what?

Holy shit. I needed to remind myself of my coping techniques because I could feel the pressure in my chest. Aside from my ex, I hadn’t heard that word in a long time, and it meant something different between her and me. When Maeve said that to me just now, it felt like my heart had somehow exploded into a hundred pieces, and then, like a puzzle, they found their way back to itself. Fuck, I needed to go, but there was so much more I wanted to say. I didn’t think Maeve was awake or even realized what she had said, but I needed her to know there was so much more to us.

Julian waited for me as I pulled up to his house, and I was already in a piss-poor mood.

“You got everything?” he asked. I confirmed we had our four weapons. I threw Julian a Glock and a Sig Sauer to tuck into his waistband.

I peeled out of his driveway and sped toward the highway.

“Jesus. You fighting with Maeve again?” Julian noticed how irritated I was.

“No,” I responded quite bluntly.

“What has got you all wound up?”

“Shit.” I concentrated on the road ahead.

“Wanna talk about it?” Julian pressed.

“Maeve told me she loved me this morning.” I carefully glanced over at Julian, who was desperately trying to cover up his smile. “She was half sleeping and delirious, but she said it nonetheless, and now I feel all fucking annoyed.”

“Why?”

“Because what if it's true?” I practically screamed out at Julian.

“Yeah, what if it was true? What would the worst-case scenario be?”

“That I fucking love her, too,” I huffed out, and my chest started to heave.

“And that’s a bad thing because…?”

I had to think about it. I had no idea what the answer to that question was.

“It isn’t, I guess. It’s just a…new feeling for me.” I lowered my tone an octave. “I don’t want to fuck this up like I did with my ex.” I was referring to being the drunk asshole that I was.

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