Page 37 of Fourth Wall

Maeve's eyes held a deep understanding as she listened intently. “That took a lot of courage,” she acknowledged, her voice filled with admiration.

“As only a teenager, you were resilient to your environment. You wanted to carve a new path out for yourself.”

I nodded, grateful for her understanding. “It wasn't easy, but it was the best decision I ever made. The military provided structure, discipline, and a sense of purpose I’d never known before. It gave me a chance to prove myself, to become more than the circumstances I was born into.”

Her fingers gently squeezed my knee, offering silent support. At that moment, I felt a profound connection with her, as if she could see the layers beneath the surface, the battles I had fought, and the demons I had overcome.

“But you know,” I continued, my voice filled with a mix of gratitude and regret. “I felt some sort of sense of duty to my girlfriend at the time. I wanted to get her out of our shitty hometown and thank her for everything she did for me. She saved my life when I was a kid. We decided to get married, not out of love, but to collect more housing money. It sounds foolish, I know, but I felt like I owed her something for saving me."

Maeve's gaze softened, her eyes reflecting compassion and understanding. "Sometimes we make choices out of necessity or survival," she said softly. "But what matters is how we grow from those experiences and the lessons we carry with us."

“You aren’t mad?” I was so nervous about telling her that I had previously been married.

“No.” She laughed. “Unless you are somehow still married today?”

“No.” I shook my head. The thoughts that usually spiraled out of control right now were quiet. I knew exactly what to say, which was a first for me.

As I gazed back at her, I felt renewed gratitude for the path I had taken, even with its unconventional twists and turns. And at that moment, sitting on the patio with the cool ocean breeze enveloping us, I couldn't help but feel that fate had brought us together, two individuals with complex stories and shared resilience.

The night sky cast a gentle glow on Maeve's face, highlighting her strength and beauty. I reached out, finally letting go of the cup of Italian ice, and gently placed my hand over hers, intertwining our fingers. It was a silent acknowledgment of the weight of my confession.

“We got divorced when I was getting out. The military was good to me, but unfortunately, when I injured myself and I knew I was getting out, I started drinking to drown my sorrows. She divorced me pretty quickly because I turned into a fucking asshole when I drank.”

“Even more so than you are now?” she jeered, and I squeezed her hand playfully. “I know sorry doesn’t really cut it, but for what it is worth, I am sorry.”

“Thank you.”

“You want to walk down to the beach a little? It’s dark and cold, but I’m feeling adventurous,” she offered, and I nodded in agreement.

We walked down the path to the beach, where we took off our shoes and stuck them in the corner of the path. The sand felt cool and wet underneath my feet, and the tide was pretty close, so the waves were crashing in.

“When I was married to Tyler, he banned me from going to the beach. He told me it was too dangerous both because the water and tides could suck you up and second because there was a lot of theft at the beach.” She looked out into the dark ocean, illuminated by the overhead moonlight.

“But I love the beach. I love the waves. I love the way the sand feels on your toes. It feels grounding." Her voice was much quieter now, and I took a few steps forward, matching her pace. We walked silently a few feet down.

There were some houses behind us, and the string lights' warm glow allowed me to see the thoughts etched deeply in her brows.

“Sometimes when I get super overwhelmed, it's hard for me to feel grounded. I feel like all these thoughts float around me, and it’s hard to string a sentence together. Tyler always called me stupid for stumbling over my words,” she confessed, and I reached out to grab her hand. I knewexactlywhat she was talking about.

“For me, it’s when I get overwhelmed. When it gets too much and I cannot visualize the path I need to take, then I start drinking. Obviously, it’s gotten much better, but that is where my issues stemmed.”

“I’ve never met anyone who understood what I meant.” She squeezed my hand tightly—a shiver of understanding passing through us. I stopped us and pulled her around so we were facing each other. A breeze passed through the space between where we stood.

“Maeve.” I swallowed…hard. The way her eyes glistened in the glowing light, the way she rocked back on her knees waiting to see what would happen.

“What is happening between us?” she asked.

“I have no fucking clue.” I took half a step closer to her. The sounds of people in the distance slowly muffled. My heartbeat quickened and grew loud in my head.

“You don’t even like me.” Her voice came out low and strained.

“A lie.” I looked down at her thick, full lips. She dropped her hands to her side and let go of mine.

“What are we doing, Christian?”

“We’re living in the moment.” My lips crashed down onto hers, and I grabbed her waist to pull her close to me. The ocean breeze rippled through her hair as she melted into my arms. Her body let go of whatever anxious thoughts held her back.

Our mouths opened, letting our tongues slip in and explore the depths of each other. But it was a primal and desperate need. Quickly, our kiss went from exploratory into something full of an animalistic drive.

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