Page 20 of Third Degree

As we reluctantly parted, breathless and intoxicated, the air crackled with newfound awareness.

Our eyes locked, and I glimpsed a world of possibilities in that profound gaze. The first kiss had sealed a bond between us, transcending age and defying logic. It was a taste of passion and vulnerability, leaving an indelible mark on both our hearts.

And I had no idea how I was going to let her go back home next week… no idea.

“Wow,” she finally said as I still kept my eyes locked onto hers. She looked out of breath as if she had been running a mile to get to me. “Was that just me?” she asked, pushing away from me slightly.

“What?” I murmured, my brow furrowing.

“Did you feel that too?” She jumped off the stool and backed away from where I was standing.

As she started to pace, I could see her emotions whirling around. I desperately wanted to pull her back into my arms and tell her I felt the same way, but I couldn’t. She was so young, and I knew that our time was fleeting.

“It was just a kiss.” It was the only thing I could croak out.

“No.” She started to throw her hands into the air and practically ran toward me. “That wasn’t just a simple kiss. I may be young and naïve about these things, but I know what I felt, and I know you felt it too. Believe what you want, but that was soul-wrenching.”

I turned away from her. Conflicted emotions over kissing someone in her house after losing Bea stirred in my mind.

“I will take you home.” I walked away from her and opened the door before heading to the car. I couldn’t look back because I knew if I did, I wouldn’t be able to handle what I would have seen.

I heard the little sobs from where I stood, and I was ashamed of myself.

First, for even putting her into this situation, but also for failing to protect her. Failing to give her some comfort. For letting her just come undone in front of me. I was failing.

“I can walk.” She wiped the tears from her eyes as she approached the car where I was holding the passenger side door open.

“Get in, Gianna.” My tone was commanding and low. I was fighting my own demons.

She swallowed hard and nodded before jumping into the car. I gave her a little hoist, and the very gentle touches had me begging for her. When I got in the car next to her, I pressed the ignition and was about to drive away when I heard her perk up.

“I have insomnia too,” she offered, and I looked over at her. Her face was still red and swollen from crying earlier. “The only time when I feel like I have some freedom is at night, so I like to do the same and garden.”

She sighed as I pulled out of the driveway.

“I don’t remember falling asleep before the sun started peeking out until yesterday in your car.” She yawned. This time, it was me placing my hand on her thigh. A slight squeeze against her bare skin.

My eyes fixed on the road for fear of what might happen when I looked over at her, and when I pulled up to the house, she was fast asleep. Her breaths were rising and falling in sync, and she was making the smallest noises.

I pulled out a blanket from the back of the car I had packed for this exact reason yesterday.

Yesterday morning, when I realized she had left the car, I felt disappointed that she didn’t wake me up, but I knew after that moment she was going to come back. There was something strange about her. Something familiar, like she was sent from the heavens to bring me the peace I’d needed to find in the last few years.

Tonight, as I witnessed the profound sadness in her eyes after our kiss and her confession about her impending departure, my heart shattered into two irreparable pieces.

If I were to vocalize this sentiment to anyone, they would likely label me a devoted and desperate admirer, akin to a loyal golden retriever. Yet I yearned for her presence in my life in any conceivable manner. After enduring two years of agonizing solitude and desensitized anguish, her arrival had illuminated a glimmer of hope, guiding me toward a different path.

So, just as the biggest simp that I was, I grabbed the blanket and pillow from the back of my car and laid it on her while I looked at tonight’s reports from the club and plotted some new plans for my return next week.

I figured that if she was going to leave, then I might as well return. This wasn’t going to stop me from going to the meeting with the Ricci family.

“Dormi bene, rosa mia(Dream well, my rose).”

8

Gianna Daphne

18 years old

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