Page 98 of I Am Salvation

Another.

And another.

I can barely walk. I can’t see either. My vision has gone blurry again. How many hits to the head can a guy take?

I’m pretty sure I’m about to find out.

They wouldn’t dare kill me, would they?

What the hell? If they do? At least I’ll be out of this fucking place. It’s not like anyone cares if I live or die.

The two of them drag me to a door, and once it’s opened, my eyes clear enough so that I can see the long stairway that leads to a cellar or basement.

One of them pushes me down the first couple of steps, and somehow—I’m not sure how—I manage to keep my footing instead of tumbling down the entire staircase.

They’re going to kick my ass in the basement.

Fine. I’ll take it. I’ll take all of it.

When we get to the bottom of the stairs, one of them pulls the string hanging down from the ceiling to turn on a lightbulb.

Four other guys stand there.

And my blood runs cold.

“This one thinks he’s a big shot,” Tully says. “We’re going to show him he’s not.”

Six? Six guys who are sixteen and seventeen years old against me?

I won’t survive this night.

“Please,” I beg.

Then I hate myself for it.

All that time in the other group home—the beatings I took and the beatings I doled out—never did I beg.

“Please what?” one of them says. “We’ll please you all right.”

I squeeze my eyes shut. Try to brace myself for the punches I know are going to come. I’ll be on the ground, staying in a fetal position as much as I can as they beat me and kick me.

But then?—

“Open your eyes, shithead.”

Slowly I open one. Then the other.

“Get his pants, Red,” Tully says.

“What?” I say.

Evil laughter surrounds me, as if ghosts are haunting this basement.

“Man, you have no idea, do you?” A big grin spreads over Tully’s face. “It’s time to pop that cherry, kid.”

Present day…

Only once.