Page 68 of Untethering Dark

“That is true, but I think most are just trying to live their lives. Thoughtlessness is more rampant than cruelty.” Defending humans was weird. She had little patience for rudeness herself. Maybe it was her short years, but she could still see humans as individuals, rather than the wildly innovative and extremely violent sum of their species over the past twelve thousand years.

“I’m sorry. It’s easiest to remember the worst, and time has embittered me.”

“You saved those children. Like Perchta saved me. You’re allowed to have your regrets, but this shouldn’t be one of them.” Threading her fingers through his, Astrid drew his hand into her lap, soothing tense muscle with the pad of her thumb in slow, steady strokes. His fur was short and velvety smooth, so pleasing to the touch. “Are you okay?”

“I will be.” He lightly brushed the back of her knuckles with the rounded side of a claw. “Remembering isn’t as bad with you here. I’ve never had someone to talk to. It just festered and festered until I couldn’t take it anymore.”

“What did you do when it got that bad?”

“Curled up right here and let sleep take me. Sometimes for decades, but usually for centuries. Although it’s always helped me settle and reset, it’s been a while since my last long rest. The humans are changing so much, so fast. I’m afraid that the next time I fall asleep for that long, I won’t recognize the world I wake up to.” Squeezing her hand, his next words were whispered. “But I’m even more afraid that you wouldn’t be there.”

Astrid hastily wiped the moisture from her eyes. “You can always talk to me. Always. And I will be here.”

“Astrid.” Gudariks hung his head, voice pained. “You’re not...”

“I was human once.” She was not going to let him finish that grim thought. “But I’m not anymore, not fully. I was quite young when I chose the hag’s path and began training for it. It won’t be long now until it’s finished. My life won’t be a short one.”

“Good.” He cradled her hand in both of his, as if she were precious. “When you first spoke to me and didn’t run, I was compelled by your courage, but looking back, I think some part of me remembered there was more to life than just the hunt. That I needed and wanted companionship, too.”

“It’s yours,” she whispered, and cupping his bony cheek, turned his face so that she could stare into his eyes. “I want to know you.”

“We picked a fortuitous time to meet, didn’t we?” He chuckled darkly, but leaned into her touch, seeking comfort in it. “We should be exploring what this is between us, getting lost in each other. Not curbing human ruthlessness.”

They had a little time they could steal back for themselves.

“We have today, tomorrow even, if we want it,” she said. “Mutter is working on a containment spell, and I’ve already begun taking the steps toward my final transformation.”

If it weren’t for this looming threat, she’d wait a little, see if what they’d started might grow into something solid and steady. Not decades or centuries, but months, maybe a year. What was a little more time when waiting for someone special? Someone who thawed a frozen piece of yourself that you never knew was there.

A deep pang of longing yawned open in her chest. But there was ferocity, too.

“You’re not alone in this.”I won’t let you stand alone.

“But the things they’re capable of, I can’t ask you to risk yourself...”

She cut him off. “You haven’t. I’m telling you that in days, I will become a hag, and your enemies will be slain, by my hand and yours. They will pay for what they’ve done twice over.”

If he thought he could argue this, he was about to learn the lengths of her stubbornness. One did not become a hag on a whim. It was a life pursuit, a devotion. When Astrid committed to something, it was final—and besides, what good was newfound power if not to protect the ones she loved and cared about? It wasn’t just Gudariks who needed her to take a stand, or even Mutter. It was Suri, Johanna, and all the other forest rangers.

“They’ll rue the day.” His gaze raked over her like hot coals. In a voice thick with gravel, he said, “Whatever you need to complete the ritual, I’ll give it.”

Did he know how hags were made? Or was this just a blanket offer of help?

She wanted him to know what he was saying and mean it. She wanted it to be him.

Demos would make a fine partner, but he didn’t have her heart. And while the final ritual didn’t require it, a lifelong devotion powered by equal, fervent passion would make the spell more potent...but more than anything, it would be a memory to cherish all her days.

“There’s something I need to discuss with you,” she began, taking a steadying breath. “And the decision of whether to accept is completely yours.” There was more than one way to complete the ritual, and it could be quite pleasant if he consented to help, if he was willing to give up a piece of himself.

He reangled his body, claws curling around her waist. “Tell me.” It was a demand as much as a plea. Maybe he did know, and maybe he wanted it, which made asking a little easier.

“To power the ritual, I need to generate strong enough magic. The kind that comes either with sacrifice or seduction—and I’d prefer the latter. There’s energy in giving and taking pleasure, and even more in siphoning off a life-creating act. A child won’t come of it, but when the time comes, just by attempting to breed me...”

“Liebling,” he breathed, guiding her onto his lap, her thighs bracketing his hips. “I’d be honored.”

Heat spiked in her at the contact, and at him stirring beneath her. Just the act of touching him made sweat bead along the back of her neck.

“That you’d choose me, when I suspect, you’d another offering the same—it means a lot that you’d trust me with this.”

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