Page 70 of Texting My Valentine

What if I let him care about me and see me as a maternal figure, only for mine and Alex’s… what,relationship… to end? What then? It’s a risk I shouldn’t let myself take, yet the easy banter is difficult to resist.

“Do you really want to be tricked?” The woman asks.

“I don’t think you can trick me,” Elliot says, holding his chin up high as he looks at the elderly woman. “Mom and Dad taught me better than that.”

Alex winks at me over the top of Elliot’s head. I can’t stop myself from grinning. Sitting in a waiting room has never been so much fun.

“The trick question is… who do you like more, hmm, Mommy or Daddy? That’s a question no child can ever answer.” She taps her nose. “Even if theyhavean answer.”

Elliot shakes his head. “I love them both the same.”

My heart picks up speed, and my belly swirls. I’ve always wondered what being part of a normal family would be like, just never from this particular angle.

“Of course youlovethem the same,” the woman says. “But I’m not talking about that. That’s the trick to it, see?”

“You asked who I liked more,” Elliot says, nodding. “I get it. But it’s hard to pick between Mom and Dad. Dad is really cool because he works hard and buys me LEGOs, but sometimes he’s too busy with work. But I know that’s only because he wants the best life for us. Mom is cool in her own way because she’s really good at poems and helps me with my homework.”

My heart freaking feels like it’s going to burst. I know I need to get myself under control, but this is an unreal level of emotion.

Suddenly, I wish Cleo and Lily were here so that I could somehow pause time to talk to them about this and declutter some of the confusion in my head.

“Oh, what a delightful answer,” the elderly woman says. She looks up when a nurse approaches. “Hello again, Cynthia. Is it my time?”

“Yes, Gloria. Shall we?”

Once she’s gone, Elliot laughs. “That was fun, kind of like being an actor.”

I smile, but there’s fear bubbling in me, too. That almost felttoonatural.

“Are you okay, Tori?” Elliot asks.

I force the smile to remain on my face. “Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. You’re the one with the busted arm.”

I fold my arms, sinking into my seat. My phone buzzes a moment later.

Alex:Is something wrong, my vivacious Valentine?

Tori:No.

Alex looks at me, his eyebrow raised, then types on his phone.

Alex:You’re aware I can read you, right, beautiful? Something changed after that elderly woman left.

Tori:Maybe I’m scared.Possibly worried by how easy that felt.

Alex:The only reason you’d need to be scared is if I lied to you, angel.If I was misleading you, or a cheating asshat, or if I had plans to hurt you in any way, maybe then it’d make sense to be scared. But I’d never do that. This is the real deal.

I put my phone in my pocket, chewing my bottom lip. I’m not sure how to tell him that that’s part of what worries me. Caring is dangerous. No matter how certain I become that Alex is nothing like Mom’s exes, it’s not like I can undo years of observations and imprinting just like that.

I can’t unsee what I’ve seen, unhear what I’ve heard. I can’t make myself into a different person, one who hasn’t experienced all the bull crap romance can dish out.

My phone buzzes again.

Alex:That was just a bit of fun. I’m not going to rush you, Tori.

Tori:I know.

I tell him that, but I'm not sure I believe it, and I'm not sure he does either.

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