Page 179 of Smooth Sailing

“He vacuums,” I announced.

“Sorry?” Bernie queried.

“Maddy and I were cleaning last Saturday, I got out the vacuum, he took it from me and vacuumed my whole house.”

“Yowza,” Bernie said.

“Has Gerard ever done that?” Charlie asked Mel.

“Once, and he did it so badly, he’s never done it again,” Mel told her.

Bernie and Charlie rolled their eyes at each other.

“Excuse me, but he has other attributes,” Mel said saucily.

“Yeah, he knows what to do with his dick,” Bernie murmured.

And we knew all about that.

“And he can make a woman come just by talking to her with that accent,” Charlie added.

There was that too.

“There’s that,” Mel spoke my thoughts. “And he cooks and does the grocery shopping, and I don’t like to do either.”

“He’s a good guy, really,” Charlie assuaged. “But he could say, ‘I don’t wanna vacuum, let’s figure out the allotment of chores,’ rather than just doing a shitty job vacuuming so he can get out of doing it.”

“I read he doesn’t like doing it, so now I do, and he didn’t have to say that because I have a mind to my man, and just to say, he has a mind to me and that’s why he cooks,” Mel returned.

“Let’s get back to Di,” Bernie urged.

“He grew up with his mom, just those two,” I shared. “And I think he had to pitch in, so it’s just a part of who he is. Like, he makes the bed in the morning just like I do.”

“Holy shit,” Mel whispered reverently.

“I know,” I said. “He listens. And he’s smart. And he gives good advice. He says he’s not affectionate, but he’s really demonstrative with me. It feels mega nice. He likes my pouch and big ass and doesn’t even glance askance at me when I eat a third cookie. Or a fourth.”

“Wow,” Bernie said.

“And he’s been at my side through all of this, and honestly, I don’t know if I would have gotten through it if he wasn’t.”

“Aw, Di,”—Charlie patted my hand—“you so would.”

“And you had your girls,” Mel reminded me.

“I know, but he was there, and he stuck, and because he did, he made it easier.”

“So he isn’t hard on the eyes, and he’s got no issue being supportive,” Bernie brought it to a fine point.

“Yes, and more,” I said.

“Please say that big man with that big body does big things for you in bed,” Charlie begged.

I smiled. “He’s very…take charge.”

Charlie rolled her eyes back and moaned.

Bernie and Mel smiled at each other.

---