Page 106 of Lose You to Find Me

I hook an arm around her shoulder and turn to my parents. “We’re going to grab dinner. Want us to bring you guys back anything?”

They both shake their heads.

Dad says, “Go be with your girl, kid. I’ll see you when you get home.”

It’s a promise I hope he holds on to.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

CALEB

That night, Dadpasses away in his sleep.

It’s a somber moment.

Silent.

Inevitable.

My mother lets out a choked sob.

She wraps me in her arms as the nurses surround his unmoving body. “He waited to make sure you were going to be okay. And that…that has to be enough.”

Chapter Thirty-Nine

CALEB

Dad’s second favoriteholiday was New Year’s because it meant fresh beginnings. “It doesn’t matter what happened in the past because this is your new chapter of life, son,” he’d always say when the countdown began.

Two arms wrap around me from behind, stirring me from the staring contest I’m having with the stars. “I thought I’d find you out here,” Raine says quietly. I feel her forehead rest between my shoulder blades before her arms tighten around me briefly in a hug before loosening. Walking to my side, she tugs on her jacket and leans against the railing. “Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you this week? I know your mom is busy working with the stone carvers to get the gravestone finished and delivered to the cemetery, so if you need me to come with you to help with the other arrangements, I will.”

Dad didn’t want a funeral. He said he wanted people to celebrate their lives, not waste them mourning the end of his. Apparently, he and Mom had an in-depth conversation about it a month or so ago. “He knew,” Mom told me the night he was taken out of the house. “He knew his time was up, but he wanted to stay just a little bit longer. For you and Raine.”

Tears burn the backs of my eyes as I clear my throat and try fighting them off. The bitter air doesn’t help any. Between the nip of chill against my face and the way the wind clings to the tears threatening to spill, it makes my vision even blurrier as I attempt to keep it together.

“You hate missing school,” I reply, knowing she’s mapped out the remainder of her degree. Every course and clinical hour is color-coded in her calendar. I don’t want to put her behind.

Raine looks from the sky to me. “I’d rather be there for you right now. I already emailed my professors saying I’ll be out for a few days.”

My heart clenches. “You don’t have to do that for me.”

Her brown eyes sadden. “Didn’t you once tell me that you’d do anything for me?”

I nod, watching her closely when those lips curl softly upward at the corners.

“Then what makes you think it’s any different for me? We’re a family, Caleb. I’m going to be there for you because I wasn’t when you needed me to be before. I’m going to make that up to you every single day to prove I’m in this.”

“What about what you need?” I ask.

Her hand rubs my arm slowly. “This isn’t about me, Caleb. Taking a day or two off classes isn’t going to kill me.”

I’m not surprised that’s her answer.

Scrubbing my face, I lean against the railing next to her. “Did you know that my favorite thing to do was feed you?”

Head tilting, her hand stills on my arm before lowering to her side. “No. I didn’t know that.”

I let loose a breath that eases some of the tightness in my lungs. “It may seem small, but it made me feel good to know I could provide for you in any way possible. My dad was the same way with my mom. I bet your dad felt the same way when he was able to bring something to the table for you and your mother.”

---