“Thanks. She is pretty awesome.”
“Darren sends his love. He said he’ll stop by tomorrow if you’re feeling up to it.”
“That would be great.”
Once my shower was finished, I stepped out, and Max wrapped the towel around me. After changing into my nightgown and robe, I walked over to the bed and sat down.
“I want to see her again, Max.”
“Now?”
“Yeah.”
“Maybe you should wait until the morning.”
I shook my head. “No. I want to see her now.”
“Okay. I’ll go grab a wheelchair.”
“I can walk.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
We went to the neonatal unit and walked into the cold room. Laney, the nurse I met earlier, smiled when she saw me.
“You’re back.”
“I’m sorry about earlier.”
She placed her hand on my shoulder. “Don’t apologize. It’s hard to see your baby like that the first time.
I walked over to where she was lying, and Laney pulled up a chair. I sat down as a few tears filled my eyes.
“You can touch her.” Laney smiled.
“Really?” I looked up at her.
“Babies need their mother’s touch, and she can hear you too, so make sure to talk to her. Trust in your abilities to start parenting. She needs you now more than ever.”
I placed my hand through the large hole of the incubator and felt the warmth on my skin as my finger softly stroked her little hand.
“She’s beautiful.” I began to cry as I looked up at Max.
“I know she is. Would it be wrong of me to say she’s the most beautiful baby in this hospital?”
I let out a light laugh. “When will I be able to hold her?” I asked Laney.
“Probably in a couple of days. She’s doing really well, and she may be able to come off the ventilator soon. She is a little anemic, which is common in babies born this early, so tomorrow morning, we’re going to give her a blood transfusion. It’s nothing to worry about; almost every baby here has had one. I’ll leave the two of you alone to visit with your daughter. If you need anything, I’ll be right across the room.”
As I stared at Sarah and stroked her tiny arm, I still couldn’t believe that she was here. Max knelt down next to me, and I removed my hand so he could touch her.
“Go ahead.” I gave a small smile.
When he touched her hand, she splayed her little fingers. “She moved.” He smiled.
I laid my head on his shoulder, staring at my tiny baby girl. We took turns touching and comforting her until Laney told us we had to leave because they were about to do a shift change. We walked back to the room, and I could tell how tired Max was.