Page 367 of Billionaire Temptations

We took a seat on one of the benches in Central Park.

“You should be,” I spoke in a harsh tone. “And now that you’re here and we’re talking after all these years, I want the answer to the question I've had ever since I was five years old. Why? Why didn’t you get the help you needed after I was born? How could you just abandon your child? Your flesh and blood? The person you carried inside you for nine months?”

“I can’t answer that because I don’t know. I did see a doctor once. Your father forced me to, and he put me on medication, but the medication made me worse. My depression deepened, and I felt like everything was hopeless. Your father grew angrier with me every day. You were constantly trying to get my attention, and I was so absorbed in my own head and dark world that I was afraid of what I might do to you.” She pulled up her sleeves and turned her wrists over where scars lay on her skin.

“I couldn’t do it anymore. I felt like such a failure to you and your father, and I didn’t know how to help myself, so I tried to take my own life. Do you remember?”

I sat there, thinking as hard as I could.

“I was five years old, and I remember Dad screaming at the nanny to get me out of the house and take me away until he called her. I never knew what happened that night. It was never discussed, and you were gone when the nanny brought me home.”

“Your father had me committed to a psychiatric hospital. While I was in there, he filed for divorce. I was granted supervised visitations, and I was ridden with guilt. That’s why I didn’t show some of the time. But when I finally worked up the courage to see you and looked into your eyes, I saw your hatred towards me. You knew I abandoned you, and you weren’t having any part of it. That’s when I knew you’d grow up to be a strong, independent woman with a strong will and mind.

After that, I stayed away because I knew that was what was best for you. I don’t blame you, Anna, for hating me. I hatemyself too for what I’d done. After a few years of being on medication, I met Paul, and he wanted children. I talked about you all the time, and he was the one who convinced me to see you in Connecticut. When I contacted your father to tell him I wanted to see you, he told me he sent you away. My heart broke, and I needed to make sure you were okay. But, when I got there, you refused to see me.”

“I couldn’t see you. I hated you,” I spoke.

“And rightfully so.”

“The only reason I’m talking to you now is because my therapist told me that I needed closure with you.”

“You’re in therapy?” she asked.

“Not so much now, but I was because I almost lost my husband.”

“Why?”

“Because I told him I was never having children. That’s what you and Dad did to me!”

“Anna,” she softly spoke as tears filled her eyes.

“So I went to therapy for my lifelong issues, and he helped me realize some things. He helped me realize that I’m not you and that I’ll never be you.”

“I want you to know that I never once stopped loving you or thinking about you. My two children know about you, and they know what I did. I talk about you all the time.”

All of a sudden, a severe cramping overtook me as I placed my hand on my belly and doubled over.

“Whoa!” I yelled.

“Anna, what’s wrong?”

“Just a cramp.”

“Have you been experiencing them all day?”

“Yes, but they’re just Braxton Hicks. I think I just need to go home,” I spoke as I got up from the bench.

We began walking towards the entrance of the park when another one hit me.

“Holy shit!” I yelled as my mother took hold of my arm.

“That was too close, Anna. I think you’re in labor.”

“I’m not in labor, Mother. I’m not due for another two and a half weeks.”

“You were born at thirty-seven weeks. Babies come when they’re ready. They don’t care how many more weeks are left or have passed.”

Chapter Thirty-Eight

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