Page 67 of Saving the Halfback

Lachlan

We were shaping up something nice. Morning practice had been nearly flawless, and Coach was ecstatic, as Nolan and Ethan were finally getting their shit together and making perfect handoffs. It was apparent, too, that Bailey had been studying the playbook. Nolan said the play, and she had it down pat every time. That made me proud. She was more badass on the field than she gave herself credit for.

As practice came to a wrap, I pulled off my gear, tossing it into my bag, which I shoved into my locker. I showered quickly before starting my trek down to the sticks. I was running low on my stash, and lately, I had been getting itchier. Itchy…shit, I hated that feeling. Anytime those insolent people brushed against me in the halls, it was like bugs crawling along my skin. I sighed, and here comes the Dark.

I could blameher. I could say all these thoughts, these feelings, were the result ofherabuse. But it wasn’t true, was it? Maybe she’d set things in motion, the final push to that part of me already teetering on the edge.

I had come to terms with it, though, withher. My parents insisted on therapy, and as much as I hated every minute of it…talking about it helped. What she’d done was wrong, and it felt right to have someone on my side that sawherabuse for what it was.

Still. Part of me believed the Dark had always been there, lurking, waiting. I would get on edge at times, and without hesitation, Bailey, Chase, or Eth would bring me back from the brink. The separation from them, the trauma to my soul and body from events and juvie, it was too much. Now, everything made my skin crawl. When people got too close to me, disgust filled me, goose bumps would spread across my skin, and I would get physically sick.A panic attack. At least, that’s what I always told myself.Just another panic attack.But over the last week, I’d begun to wonder if, perhaps, the Dark was getting stronger. What if I only got sick because I fought it so much?

So, what had caused the heightened senses? What had caused the Dark to perk up? Because, in previous years, I could pick and choose a girl to bend to my beck and call, and when in control, I was able to touch and pleasure. Now, the thought of anyone but Bailey touching me was enough to bring forth the Dark.

I chuckled. I guess that was it, then. Some part of me needed to defend Bailey. And if I had to answer the Dark’s call to do that, I wouldn’t hesitate.

Lee was standing just within the sticks, a third-year dropout, genius of a mind. He didn’t even have to say anything. I held out his cash, and he slipped the baggie of green into my hand.

Within the outer edge of the school property, all hidden behind, between, and on top of trees and stumps, it was peppered with students. Some smoking together, some sipping alcohol, and some just getting away, alone. Away from grades, reality, and life. And this was where I found myself…every morning during my free block.

I took my baggie of green and found my tree to sit in front of. I ground and prepped it before putting it in my pipe and lighting, taking a deep hit and letting the good stuff flow. Soon, the tendrils of fear, disgust, and pain that withered against my skin would dissipate and I could function…normally.

Normally. See, everyone thought I got high just to get high or because I was addicted. But damn it if I didn’t do it so I could feel normal. So I could walk the halls without snapping at everyone to get the hell away. So I could walk into a classroom without thinking “they know” or wanting to rip their judging eyes from their sockets. Man, some people get paranoid when taking the green, but me? I was paranoid without it.

The weed mellowed me out. It never did anything odd, like cause hallucinations, so I almost cursed Lee for selling me something laced when my eyes landed on Bailey walking toward me. I blinked a few times and squinted to make sure I was seeing right, but I could never mistake that body. Those curves. That long hair framing the gorgeous face.I am definitely not gay, I thought as I licked my lips and soaked in the sight of her.

Bailey walked right up to me, looked down, and stopped. I glanced at the pipe in my hand, then back up to her. “You real?”

A slow smile spread on her lips. “Yes, Lachlan, I am.”

“Shiiit. That’s good. I thought Lee sold me crap.” I took another hit of my pipe as she sat next to me. I waited for it. For thewhy do you do that?Oryou shouldn’t do drugs.But it never came…because my girl isn’t like that.

“Does it help?” she asked instead.

I held the poison in my lungs, but instead of constricting them, I felt free as I blew out all the bad within me. “Yeah, it really does, me for, anyway.”

Bailey sat down next to me, her arm resting a mere paper’s width from mine. God, she smelled good. Did she even know how good she smelled? Fucking sunshine.

She was quiet for a moment before she held her hand out. I raised an eyebrow at her. Did she really want to do this? “No pressure,” I told her. “It’s not for everyone.”

She bit her lip, and I could see the war within her eyes. My girl was hurting and looking for an escape. I kept quiet, careful not to pressure her. She released her lip, taking a steadying breath before coming to her conclusion. “I want to… I want to try.”

I nodded and got it ready for her, turning to face her. “Have you done this before?” She shook her head. “All right, you good with skipping school all day?”

“All day?”

“It’s your first time, and you don’t know how it will affect you.”

She nodded. “I’m good.”

I was nervous because the stuff I bought was good, so I would only let her take a hit or two. Even then, it wouldn’t be long before she felt it. I talked her through it as I took another hit from the pipe, holding it to my lips, putting my finger over the carb hole while I pulled in, then released it to let the air flow as the smoke filled my lungs. Then I handed the lighter and pipe to her.

She followed through exactly as I had explained it, and it wasn’t long before she was coughing up a storm. I handed her a bottle of water from my bag. “I probably seem pathetic,” she said.

“Nah, adorable, but not pathetic. Everyone coughs their first time.”

She groaned. “You’re not allowed to call me pet names now too.” My body froze. Who was calling my girl pet names? “What do we do now?” she asked.

I took a deep breath to get myself back under control. “Sit back and enjoy. Go low and slow, young grasshopper.” I laughed,grass-hopper. That was a good one.

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