Page 7 of His Vengeful Tradwife

"Emmylou is up," she said. "I'll see you later. Call me if you need anything."

"I don't need help taking care of my own children," I said irritably, trying blearily to rub the sleep out of my eyes.

6:30 am? What the fuck? Is this what time Tallulah and the kids usually got up on the weekends?

She ignored this.

"Bye, Maverick. Have fun."

She kissed Emmylou and sashayed out the door before I could think to ask her where she was going. Although she normally dressed in picture-perfect old-fashioned flouncy dresses or gingham overalls for her channel, with very high and modest necklines, I noticed today that she was in a sleek, form-fitting white dress that hugged every one of her curves, rising upher curvy thighs, cut low so I got an eyeful of her overflowing cleavage.

Andit looked like she had taken off her wedding ring.

EvenIhadn't done that yet.

I felt a little uneasy for some unknown reason, but I pushed the feeling aside. It didn't matter what she was wearing or where she was going. What mattered was that Amanda was going to meet the kids for the first time and we were going to have a fun day at the zoo.

After feeding the kids frozen waffles and getting them dressed, we were just getting our shoes on when Amanda came over.

I was a little surprised to see her in a slim pencil skirt and high heels.

"Babe, you look amazing, but you know we're going to the zoo, right?" I asked, giving her a quick kiss.

"Yes, of course," she said, but I saw how her eyes darted around. "I thought Tallulah would be here," she hissed to me.

"She's not," I said shortly, and I felt that prickle of uncertainty again.

Where the hell had my wife gone dressed like that?She never went out like that. It wasn’t part of her tradwife image at all.

"No matter," Amanda said, smiling brightly at Gabriel, Seraphina, and Emmylou. "Let's do this, Maverick! Some women act like taking care of kids ishard, but that's just a lie mothers tell to justify their performance of antiquated maternal roles. It's really quite easy."

This seemed like it might be Amanda's attempt to get over her nervousness about meeting the kids, so I said nothing.

"Oh god, let's not take the minivan," Amanda said as soon as we got outside. "We're notthosekind of people, Maverick. We're not the kind of people whose lives revolve around kids."

I was a little taken aback. Amanda had come over in her little sporty car.

"I'm not sure if Emmylou's carseat will fit in the back of yours," I said.

"We'll make it work!" she caroled happily, so I transferred the carseat and buckled all the kids in. It was a little bit of a tight fit, but it would work. Then I reached for the diaper bag, but Amanda shook her head.

"That’snot going to fit in the back; I have all my golf clubs there. And I don’t want to lug around a bunch of snacks all day. Plus, you know I'm not one of those status-obsessed women who has to have designereverything, including a diaper bag! I'm just so down-to-earth. I think that's why we get along so well."

"We do get along well, baby," I said, and squeezed her hand quickly, putting my doubts about the outing aside.

God, it was so refreshing to be with someone who didn't insist on such orderly and regimented trips. Tallulah had us waiting for 10 minutes in the car sometimes as she went through the diaper bag to make sure everything was there. Now,thiswas the life. Living in the moment!

At first, the zoo trip went well enough.

Gabriel, Seraphina, and Emmylou were thrilled to see all the animals, and shrieked with delight when I bought some food for the giraffe and it flicked out a long tongue, eating all the pellets in the bucket and dousing my hand with a healthy serving of saliva.

“Ew,” Amanda said.

I bought ice cream for the kids and let them ride the carousel several times.

This was going amazing! Soon, Amanda would be comfortable with the kids, and we would make our own little family unit, just me, the love of my life, and my kids.

Amanda looked like she was limping a bit, not surprising when she was wearing 4-inch heels.

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