Page 12 of Finding Her Strength

My stomach drops as his words begin to filter into my brain. I’m part of a deal? I didn’t agree to any sort of exchange. “I don’t understand. How am I a part of this?”

“As payment for his debt, you are to be my wife once his death certificate is signed.”

I shake my head in both disagreement and disbelief. This can’t be happening to me again. I didn’t want to live with my father after my grandmother’s death, but I had no choice. He was the only one who could take me, and I was still a minor.

I refuse for this to be my future.

“I’m sure this is a shock, but I have a sizable income, so you will be comfortable. You’ll live a more affluent life with me than you did with your father. Plus, you have no other options. I hold ownership over all your money and assets. If you leave, you’ll have nothing.”

Standing, I rush to the bathroom, the contents of my stomach no longer able to stay down. I heave until there’s nothing left to expel, my body shivering as dread races up my spine. This was not the outcome I envisioned when I knew my father was dying. I was supposed to finally be free. Free of the crushing weight I’d been carrying for so long. Free to live the life I’d been dreaming of since my grandmother died. I will not do something just because some bastard deems it so. I’m no longer the frightened little girl with no means to stand up for herself.

With shaking hands, I turn the faucet on at the sink. The cold water is cooling to my heated skin as I splash it on my face. The reflection in the mirror shows a person I barely recognize as myself. My olive skin looks pale and ghostly, the kinky curls of my black hair are sticking out around my face while my dark eyes show the fear radiating from my pores.

This is not me.

I’m so tired of not being myself.

Walking back out to the room, I have a renewed sense of energy. I will not marry this man. I’ll run away. Find a newplace to live. I don’t have much in savings, but it could be enough to at least get me out of the city. I have work experience, so I’m sure I could find a decent job somewhere.

“Rosemary, I know this isn’t what you expected to hear today. You have no other choice, though, I’m afraid,” Antony says to me. I keep my head down, gaze fixed firmly on the floor. I refuse to look at Antony. Too afraid my partially formed plans will show in my eyes.

“She’ll be obedient,” my father rasps. “I’ve taught her what happens if she doesn’t follow my instructions.”

“Good. I expect full cooperation from her.”

Chills run down my spine as Antony’s icy words float through the room. No way will I let him have me. I’ll be homeless before I go willingly with him.

I just need to be smart with my next steps.

I’ll get away. No matter what it takes.

8

HOPE

Iflip over from my stomach to my back for the umpteenth time this morning. I’ve been awake for the last two hours, unable to find my way back to sleep. Instead of a nightmare waking me up, the image of hazel-green eyes and strong muscles haunt my dreams. Now, I can’t stop my thoughts from swirling.

The mystery man yesterday was a wrench in my day I was not prepared to deal with. What’s worse is my thoughts sway from outright indignation to fascination in the span of a few minutes. I mean, who flirts with a girl while they’re buying flowers for someone else? Seriously? I know he said they were for a friend, but there’s no way a guy who looks like him is just friends with a girl. He probably has several women lined up, ready to go, whenever he wants it.

The other thing I keep getting stuck on was his apology for blurting out a compliment. He didn’t take his compliment back, but he apologized for the inappropriate words. It was weird having a man apologize to me for something so small. It’s never happened to me before, and now, I can’t get the encounter out of my head.

Between his light brown hair, hazel eyes, and strong jaw,he was very handsome. It also felt like I could feel his smile deep in my soul, which was weird. I’m not sure what’s going on in my head at this point. Reacting to the guy at the grocery store as well as the mystery man yesterday is abnormal.

A sigh falls deep from my chest. There’s no point in dwelling on these thoughts. It’s not like anything will ever happen between us, even if I wanted it to. And I don’t. I don’t want anything to happen. The idea of having a man in my life sends a shiver down my spine, and not the good kind, either. I’ve never experienced a good shiver. I’ve read about them in romance books but have no idea what it would be like to feel one in real life.

I shake my head at the direction of my thoughts. I don’t need any of that. I don’twantany of that. I’d rather be alone with no experiences than to be beholden to another man—especially one who could be a womanizer. I came to Sonoma to build myself up, not have someone else do it for me, so it’s best if I move on from this silly line of thinking.

Instead of continuing to dwell, I get out of bed to get ready for the day. I’m moving out of my apartment today. The last couple of days have been crazy. Quinn has been so helpful in getting the rental house ready for me. I’ll be forever grateful for her kindness. She’s providing a lot of the furniture since most of the things in this apartment aren’t mine. They wouldn’t fit in her house, even if they were. Quinn’s rental is a beautiful three-bedroom house, whereas this apartment is barely big enough to hold one person.

The only things I’m taking are the kitchen stuff I bought and the stuff from my bedroom. Oh, and the comfy patio chair I splurged on when I first moved here. I was told there is a patio space in the backyard, which I’m looking forward to utilizing. My tiny balcony is nice, but not quite functional.

Walking out to my disaster area of a kitchen, I take in the boxes stacked on the floor. The empty countertop makes merealize I packed my coffee pot last night, which was monumentally stupid. If I have any hope of packing the remaining items or making it through the exhausting day ahead, I’m going to need caffeine.

Grabbing my keys from the counter, I head to the little café around the corner from my apartment. I’m going to miss being within walking distance of this place. I have a feeling this new house will be exactly what I’ve been missing, though.

A knockat my door has me setting the tape dispenser down on top of the box I was about to close. I quickly open the door, and all the blood drains from my face when I see who’s on the other side.

I expected it to be Quinn and Cooper, but instead, the hazel-eyed stranger from yesterday is standing there. Fear snakes down my spine, and I grip the door handle a little harder to keep from falling down.

---