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Libby: Oh my God! Please do NOT make this a thing. I’m engaged, remember?

Johanna: I remember…

Damn her. I toss and turn all night thinking about her texts and thinking back to the day on the water with Cas. Oh great, now evenI’musing his nickname’s nickname.

~

SUNDAY PASSES IN A BLUR and when my alarm goes off Monday morning, I race around the house to get ready.

“You seem in an awful hurry this morning,” Will remarks as I grab a banana and quickly shove it in my bag.

“Shit!” I throw a hand over my heart. “Sorry, I didn’t see you sitting there. I thought you were gone already.” I hope he doesn’t read too much into that statement. I feel the flames of the fire I’m playing with start to lick at my heels.

“Not much to do until dinner tomorrow night. I have almost everything in order to present. We’ve taken the project as far as we can until we can break ground and are given the green light to ship the parts.”

“Oh, well good! You deserve a day to relax.” I lean over and give him a light peck on the lips but before I can pull away, he places his hand on the back of my head and deepens the kiss. I’ve wanted this from him for so long but now that it’s here, I only feel revulsion and I’m convinced this actually isn’t what I want at all.

~

I’M REALLY HOPING Casper is at the gym. I want to know if he’s going to be at the governor’s house tomorrow. I’m not sure if it would make things easier or harder to know he was close by but a warning of his presence would probably be helpful so I’m not caught off guard. Maybe even if he’s there, he has to stay hidden? I don’t really know how personal security things work.

I park and see Alida and Johanna already warming up so I trot over to join them in my spandex shorts and favorite yellow tank top.

Living in a place where it’s permanently summer is amazing. My tan has deepened and my wardrobe has gone from long-sleeves in dark, dreary colors, to all neon and barely-there fabrics. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy showcasing the body I work so hard to maintain. And I absolutely donotmiss the bullshit polka dot prints and pearls that Will was so fond of. I may have accidentally made a Goodwill run while packing.

Johanna picks up on my scanning eyes and says quietly so Alida doesn’t hear, “He’s not here today.”

I feel my face fall at her words and she laughs before covering her mouth.

“What’s so funny?” Alida asks.

Thankfully, Johanna recovers quickly. “I heard Tristan hit on Libby hardcore on Saturday and Jörn had to put her with someone else.”

Alida chuckles and rolls her eyes. “Guys. They’re the same everywhere, right?”

I go through the motions in our workout, thankful for the companionship of my girl group but not quite ready to divulge all the details, yet. Johanna knows about Jörn, Tristan, and Casper because she instructs at the kite school as well, but it’s a small island and I need this to stay quiet. At least until I figure out what the hell I’m doing and what my next step is.

Nine

WHEN I GET HOME from the cultural arts center on Tuesday, I desperately need a shower. Thankfully, I have two hours before we have to leave and I will need every minute.

Our master bathroom, much like the bedroom, is a work of art. Black granite counter tops with dual sinks. We have a flat, rain-style showerhead and a window that opens from inside the shower, allowing the warm Caribbean breeze to caress my skin while the hot water rains down on me. It truly is paradise.

Thankfully, it’s also effective in washing away all the smells from the day, even if it isn’t enough to wash away my nerves. Even now, my hands are sweating as I lather the soap on my skin.

Will comes into the bathroom and places a martini on the counter for me. “Thought you might like a drink before we go.”

I eye it appreciatively. “Thank you. I’ll be ready to go in about twenty-five minutes.”

He sets his drink down next to mine and reaches into his pocket. “I also got this.” He pulls out a red ring box that looks distorted through the wet glass door. He opens the lid to the box and the biggest damn diamond I have ever seen is sitting inside. No shit, the rock has to be at least three or four carats. I open the door to see if it’s a trick of distortion through the drops of water.

It isn’t.

“Ohmigod, Will.” This isn’t the diamond he proposed to me with. That ring lives in the box in my drawer when I go to the gym, surfing, or the cultural center. It’s beautiful but evenitwas heavy and cumbersome and it’s half the size of what he’s showing me now. I’m a simple band kind-of-girl.

A smile breaks out on his face. “I know this one is different, but I thought you could use an upgrade since I got a bonus already.”

Not wanting to get in a pissing match before this dinner, I praise the ring. As the scales fall off my eyes, I see more and more of the transition of his character in his actions. This ring was bought to impress his boss and the governor. If he really knew me at all, he’d know I amfartoo active to actually wear that thing anywhere. I would have been happy with a simple band. In fact, one of those silicone bands would be perfect for me. As it is, he’s slipping a $40,000 diamond in a platinum band on my finger as I step out of the shower. The weight of the stone as heavy on my hand as it is in my heart.

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