Page 5 of Unexpecting

“Yeah,” I admitted shamefacedly. “I didn’t mean to go all girly and cry on your shoulder like that. Sorry.”

He gave a shrug and stood up. My breath caught as he stretched his six-foot-three frame. His abs and pecs and the… whole package was pretty amazing. “Anytime.” Then he turned and gave me such an obviously lascivious wink that I had to laugh. “And I mean anytime.”

I’m not in the habit of sleeping with my roommates. Definitely not Cooper since we’ve always had a great brother-sister relationship going on. But J.B. has always been different. We actually dated way back when Cooper first introduced us—if you can call three dates dating—but then Cooper offered me the apartment in the house, and we thought it would be too strange to be involved and living in the same house but not really living together, so we decided to keep it just friends.

I’ve always enjoyed being friends with men. They’re easy, no pettiness, and let’s face it, sometimes guys are just fun to hang with. But Cooper and J.B. are definitely two of my best friends, and so while I’ve always had a twinge of “what if?” with J.B., I’m really glad to have him as such a good friend. One night, about six months after I moved in, we got together, and things happened. And again the next night, which Cooper discovered by walking in on me in J.B.’s bed. He wasn’t happy, but because we both love him, we agreed not to continue anything. The interest was pretty strong on my part and I think for him, too, but tempting as it was, I knew what J.B. was like. He doesn’t do relationships or commitments or long-term anything, and I had no preconceptions that I was going to be the one to change him. It might be fun for a while, but I knew it wouldn’t last, so why go through the heartache and screw up a really good living arrangement?

I threw my pillow at J.B., which is difficult to do while trying to keep covered. “We agreed it shouldn’t happen again,” I reminded him. “For Cooper’s sake.”

J.B. shrugged again and began hunting for his pants. “You decided that. Not me. Coop’s a big boy. He can find someone else to walk in on if he really puts his mind to it.” He pulled on his pants and found his shirt lying crumpled under the bed. As he was putting it on, he came over to my side of the bed. Before I could think to move away, he leaned down, cupping my cheek in his hand, and gave me a kiss.

I told myself the light-headedness I felt was just because I was still foggy from lack of sleep. J.B. is talented at a great many things, and kissing might be top of the list. I didn’t say keeping it friends-only was easy.

“Still want me to go?” he whispered as he pulled away. His lips were a breath away from mine.

“Yes… no…” I murmured with my eyes still closed. “Maybe...” Then as I remembered my vow from earlier this morning, “Yes,” I said clearly and pulled back. J.B. had a big smile on his face. “Don’t do that again. Moron. Go.”

“Ask me nicely,” he said, still grinning. Was he trying to make this more difficult than it already was? Why on earth did he have to be so good-looking? At least he was pulling on his pants because those boxer shorts were becoming somewhat distracting.

“Go! And that’s as nice as you’ll get from me.”

“I’m going, then,” he said. “Your loss.” But just as he turned away, his eyes lit onto something sitting on the nightstand next to my bed. “What’s that?”

The way he said it made me think there was some sort of rodent sitting there quietly watching us. “What!”

“That!” He was pointing at a book, A Young Woman’s Guide to the Joy of Impending Motherhood. It looked a little worse for wear; the spine was cracked, and there was a drink ring on the cover, but there was nothing about it that should get J.B. that excited.

“It’s just a book. Sometimes I read it before bed. My mother gave it to me a few years ago. I’m not sure why. It’s really old, too, from the forties, and I don’t know if she thought it would be useful—not that she’s ever given me much that’s of use, especially recently, but…”

“Why do you still have it? You’re not…?” J.B.’s eyeballs were practically popping out as he goggled at me.

“No. Not yet, anyway. But I want to have a baby. You know that,” I told him calmly. “I’ve told you that.”

“But… this wasn’t… we used a condom… you didn’t…”

“What are you trying to say?”

“But you want to have a baby!”

“So? Not like this! Not with you! That was just sex, not me trying to conceive! God, your ego…”

“Well, what am I supposed to think?”

“Think about how I was upset and drunk and you took advantage of me,” I told him sarcastically.

“I did not!” he blustered.

“See how it feels?” I gave him a good teacher glare. “I did not sleep with you to intentionally get pregnant. I would never do that to you. I wouldn’t do that to anyone! If I could and would, then I’d already have a baby. And if you continue this line of nervous babbling, I’m going to get upset, and that won’t be good for either one of us.”

J.B. just looked at me as he took a few deep breaths. In all the years I’d known him, he was always so cool and calm. I’d never seen him this close to freaking out. If it wasn’t almost offensive, I might have laughed. But it also showed me I was making the right decision. I couldn’t get involved with anyone else. I was going to do this on my own.

“Casey!” Cooper called down the stairs again. “You want to eat or what?”

“I’m going,” J.B. said hurriedly. He held my gaze for a long moment before he let out a small sigh. “I know. Of course, you wouldn’t. I’m sorry I thought… what I thought.” And then he was gone, still buttoning up his shirt as he headed for the door and before I could tell him any more about what I’d decided. Who would have thought he’d get so bent out of shape about a book? I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of unease about what he might say about me deciding to have a baby by myself.

It had nothing to do with him, I told myself staunchly. J.B. was a friend, and if he wanted to remain my friend, then he’d support me. And while our romantic interludes—that sounds so much better than calling them simple hookups—were definitely enjoyable, it wouldn’t happen again because I was giving up men.

No more men—no more dating. J.B. was the last of them, and while it’s always nice to go out with a bang, I didn’t regret him being the last man I’d be with for a while. At least until after I managed to become a mother. And because I’d decided to use the artificial way to go about it, there wouldn’t be a chance of sex getting in the way of anything. Sex always gets in the way of things—especially with J.B.

---