Page 129 of Trying Sophie

Chapter Thirty-Three

Declan

I sat in the dark, another dram of whiskey in my hand. I’d lost count of how many this was today, but since I was still coherent, I decided it obviously wasn’t enough. I wasn’t sure there was enough whiskey in the world to dull my pain.

Mutely, I spun my phone in my hands. I wanted to call her but I didn’t want to risk further rejection. Sophie had made her thoughts clear. She didn’t believe me; didn’t want to believe me. She was letting her mistrust guide her actions and I was paying for the sins of the men who’d come before me.

It wasn’t fair. Nothing about any of this was fair.

I opened my messages app, looking over the last set of texts I’d sent; the ones where I’d begged her to give me five minutes of her time, where I promised her I’d explain everything.

Anger burned hot in my throat. I wanted her to feel what I felt. To know what it was like when the person you loved turned their back on you. Told you goodbye. Broke your fucking heart.

Dragging my thumb across the keyboard, I started typing.

Declan: You know what? Fuck you.

Declan: Fuck you Sophie Fucking Newport.

Declan: I wish I’d never met you. I wish your grandparents had never sent me to fetch you. I wish I’d never seen your face. I wish I’d never tasted your lips. I wish I’d never made love to you.

Declan: I wish I’d never let you in.

Declan: You’re through? Well, guess what? I’m through too.

Declan: So don’t come crawling back when you realize what an epic fucking mistake you made because I don’t want you anymore.

Declan: Have a nice life. I hope I never see you again.

By the time I was done, I realized there was no coming back from this. I wish it had made me feel better, but I only felt worse. Much, much worse.