Page 2 of Hearing Hank

“I quit my job,” I tell him. “And I’m not quite sure what’s next. I may be freaking out a tiny bit, but the one thing I am sure of is that I’m here to make sure that my bestie gets the bestest wedding ever!”

“If you’re really all right we don’t need to talk about it,” Paul tells me. I take a beat to think about it and discover that the sleep and the distance really have made it okay. It’s still scary, but I know I’ll be fine, and I really am committed to enjoying Paul’s wedding and my time off.

“I really am okay, it’s what I chose,” I reassure him. “Let’s go check out the ranch where you’re getting hitched.”

3

Hank

I’mfinallyworkingonthat barn door hinge when I hear an engine heading up the driveway. I drive the last screw in the new hinge and straighten up to check out who’s here. Wyatt gave me a head’s up a couple of days ago that Paul’s friend from Denver was coming to stay and help put the wedding together, so I’m not surprised to see a little blue car that I don’t recognize pull up near the house. I’m also not surprised to see Paul climb out of the passenger side. What happens next makes me feel like someone hit me in the head with a two-by-four. The driver’s door opens and the most breath-taking human I’ve ever seen steps out.

He’s gorgeous. Tall and lean, but with muscles, not angles. Not as tall as my 6’3”, but close. I’m happy that he hasn’t looked my way yet because I’m not sure I can stop staring. He’s wearing sunglasses and several dangly, sparkly earrings. I’m pretty sure his full, pouty mouth has some kind of makeup on it, and I want to run over and lick it off.

He’s doing a slow turn survey of the ranch and I quickly turn and head off in the opposite direction to try and keep from looking like some sort of weirdo. Unfortunately, I fail completely when I run straight into the open barn door with my forehead. That was epic. I can tell I’m not the only one who thinks so because I can hear smothered laughter from the direction of the car. Guess it doesn’t matter how pretty that guy is, I won’t be showing my face around him again.

I can feel the heat in my skin, and I know my entire face is bright red. I definitely don’t want to run into Mark or Wyatt, so I head out away from the house and end up at the far end of the corrals. The brief embarrassment is quickly becoming anxiety, and I’m having a hard time keeping from spiraling into a full-blown panic attack. I take a seat on the grass against a fence post and concentrate on my breath, in and out. It takes a few minutes, but the adrenaline backs off, and I start to get some perspective. I’ve gotten better and better at managing my anxiety with therapy and coping techniques in the last few years, and by the time I’ve taken a fifteen-minute break, I can picture the beautiful stranger in my head with hardly any urge to run. I may not be able to talk around him, but I should be able to face him and Paul without making any more of a fool of myself.

Thinking about Paul reminds me that I need to get the goats staked out on the side of the house today. We’re going to have them clear the brush and weeds off of a quarter acre on the south side of the house to make a big lawn to hold the wedding on. There are a couple of nice old trees on that side that the goats won’t bother, and it should be a beautiful spot once they clear the brush back.

Seems like it’s going to be a pretty big party. When Wyatt and Mark got married they just had the ceremony in the living room with me and Sam as witnesses, and then we went to Leanne’s restaurant for dinner. It suited those two down to the ground. Sam and Paul want a bigger party, and that suits them too. Sam is friends with literally everyone in town, and Paul’s been thinking about what he’d like his wedding to look like for a long time. Kind of cute, really, as long as I don’t think about all the people that will be here. And just like that, Paul’s gorgeous friend is back in my head. I know Wyatt told me his name, but I can’t remember it now. It might have started with an L?

I collar four of the goats and lead them up to the house and around the corner. Of course, just my luck, Paul and his friend are standing right in the middle of the south yard. I pretend I don’t see them as I walk the perimeter and stake the goats in the four corners of the area that we need to be cleared. It’s bad practice to stake them too close to each other or else they’ll end up with tether spaghetti, they’ll pull their grounding stakes out, and go get into trouble.

Pretending that I can’t see the men talking in the middle of the yard doesn’t mean I can’t hear them though.

“Are you sure that this will all be cleared? I can help if they need more hands. I can see how it could be beautiful out here, but that’s a lot of bushes and weeds.”

Paul laughs. “They’re not using hands, that’s what the goats are for. Hank says they’ll get it done in time so I’m sure they will. We just need to worry about the setup for the actual event. I’m sure it will look great out here.”

“Hank?” I hear Paul’s friend ask, and I can see out of the corner of his eye that he’s gesturing to me. Paul nods, and the friend heads toward me, followed closely by Paul.

“Hey Hank, is your head okay?” the man asks. I appreciate the concern, but I couldn’t answer him if my life depended on it. I nod and glance sort of desperately at Paul.

“Oh, Hank doesn’t talk,” Paul says, like it’s completely normal. “Hank this is my friend, Leroy, we call him Lee. Lee this is Hank.”

I stick out my hand and Lee leans forward and slides his against my palm like he wants to feel my skin instead of shaking hands.

“Hank, it’s nice to meet you. I hope your head’s okay.”

I nod again, too busy basking in his presence that I don’t notice where we’re standing until it’s too late. Henry is staked in this corner, and he's decided that Lee’s backside makes too tempting a target to resist. I see him coming, head down, behind Lee at the last minute, but about the time my eyes get wide and my mouth drops open, Henry has made forceful contact with Lee’s backside, which forces him into me, pushing me down on my back in the yard with a very surprised Lee flat on top of me.

“What the fuck!?” Lee exclaims into my chest.

Paul recovers first from the surprise and is giggling madly as he tries to help Lee to his feet. “I’m so sorry! That’s Henry and that’s his favorite game. Usually, we make sure we aren’t standing too close to him.”

Paul continues giggling as Lee climbs to his feet looking equally irritated and amused, and glares at the very smug-looking goat, then reaches down to offer me a hand.

“Well,” he says, as he hauls me up with a surprisingly strong grip. “I would say I don’t usually end up on top of people the first time I meet them, but that’s just not completely true.” He bats his eyelashes at me, and I have no idea what to do with the vivid image that idea paints in my head. So I go with my old classic. I turn red and run away.

4

Leroy

WatchingHankturnredand hurry off leaves me equally irritated and confused. Someone who works on a ranch for a gay couple probably isn’t homophobic, right? So why the disappearing act? It makes me feel better that Paul looks equally confused. I raise my eyebrow questioningly at him and he just shrugs and changes the subject.

“Let’s go find Wyatt and Mark if they’re still here. I want to introduce you.”

We track down Wyatt in short order. Mark’s had to go out of town for work, so Wyatt shows me the guest room and lets me know that he cooks plenty for every meal if I’d like to eat with them, but no pressure. I really like Wyatt’s calm energy, and I find myself relaxing already. Although I do keep looking behind me for goats.

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