Page 14 of Protecting Paul

He walks away, and I’m stuck thinking about what he said. Is there a way I won’t get hurt here? I’m getting too invested in a relationship that’s doomed to end. Hell, it’s not even a relationship. It’s a situation-ship at best.

I dive back into my work, but my focus isn’t there. I read the same report ten times and still don’t process it. This is the most unproductive workday of my life. I decide to set aside the paperwork for now and take a breather.

I step outside and appreciate the fresh air. It does clear my head, at least. I realize I can’t control everything and need just to enjoy the good things. Jerry is gone, and Paul will be safe for a little bit. And then, my phone buzzes. It’s Paul.

Thanks, Sammy. They got Jerry out of here. Justice is served, his text read.

I laugh softly. I can practically hear the way he’d say it. His voice fills my head, and I can’t wipe the smile off my face. I send back a quick text.

Anything for you. I’m just glad you can breathe again. Be safe, okay?

Maybe Paul can breathe easy again, but I still can’t. He’s got my head so messed up. I know it’s not his fault. He can’t help how he makes me feel, just like I can’t stop those feelings.

It dawns on me how truly happy he makes me. I love my job and my family, but Paul gives me butterflies. When he kisses me, I lose myself in his lips. I know there’s a word for my feelings, but it scares me like hell.

8

Paul

It’sthefirstdayI’m back at my old house. Jerry is gone, and I’m alone in the dilapidated structure. I’d be lying if I said I don’t miss staying with Sam. It was so goddamn nice.

When Sam would walk in the door from work, I couldn’t keep my hands off of him. It was like I was magnetized to him. He is such a good kisser. And being held by him makes me feel warm and content and safe. Despite what he said, he’s also really fucking good at giving head. He always manages to leave my legs shaking.

I do a walkthrough of the house, noting everything that needs fixing. It’s a long list. I curse my stupid dad for not doing a damn thing around here. He was so incompetent in every way. It’s insane that my uncle was living like this.

I’m overwhelmed. It’s not like I’m a handyman; I sure can’t afford to hire one to help. It’s going to take longer than I initially thought to get the house straightened out enough that I can put it up for sale and get anything out of it.

Right as I think that there’s a knock on my door. I worry that it’s going to be Jerry. I’m not expecting company, and it would be just like him to show up the day after getting evicted. I open the door nervously, but relief fills me when I see it’s just Sam.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” I ask, but the smile on my face gives away my excitement.

“I wanted to check up on how you’re doing.” The smile on his face is just as excited as mine. “I also wanted to offer my help and some pizza.”

“Your help?” I ask curiously. I notice then that he’s got a box of pizza in his hands. I was so engrossed in his handsome face and sweet smile that nothing else registered in my brain. “With…?”

“The house, duh,” Sam says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “This is way too much work for one person. Plus, I’m pretty handy, no pun intended.”

“Oh my god, shut up,” I roll my eyes, but I’m laughing. Sam can be so goofy sometimes, but I love it. “But seriously, you think you can help out? I’m at a loss.”

I move aside to let him in. He takes in the state of the house and sighs. He sets the pizza box on the counter and turns to me.

“Working with my Dad and whatnot, I picked up a few things. I candefinitelyhelp if you want.”

“I could use it.” I also will take any excuse to spend more time with Sam. “I don’t even know where to start.”

“First, we start with pizza,” Sam says, opening the box. The smell of pizza fills the house, and my stomach growls. “Then we’ll figure out how to fix this mess. If you haven’t noticed, I don’t do much besides work, so I have plenty of time to help.”

“You’re the best,” I say as I grab a slice of pizza and lean against the counter. Sam does the same, and our arms brush against each other. “You’re like a goddamn knight in shining armor right now.”

“Yeah, no, tarnished armor maybe.” He laughs through a mouthful of pizza and nudges me. “But it’s no problem. I get bored sitting at home.”

I know he’s downplaying it. Once again, he’s going out of his way to help me, just like he always does. He’s such a good guy; it makes my heart hurt. We finish half the pizza before shoving the rest in the fridge.

“Alright, let’s see….” Sam walks around the house and assesses the situation. As always, I trail behind him. “Do you have any tools?”

“Uh, my dad might have kept some in the garage?” I lead him to the garage, where luckily, we find some tools to start. Sam brings them inside and begins to look through them. It’s kind of hot that he’s so handy, I have to admit.

“We can start with these, but I can go with you to the hardware store to grab some more specific stuff. New wood, paint, stuff like that. Rome wasn’t built in a day. We’ve got our work cut out for us.”

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