Page 9 of Protecting Paul

As if to punctuate his point, he throws the eviction notice on the ground and steps on it. I’m struck by how pathetic he is. I pity him honestly, and I feel grateful I don’t have to deal with a family like that. The gratitude is overtaken almost immediately by how sorry it makes me feel for Paul.

Paul flinches again when the door slams. I hear him sigh heavily before turning toward me.

“Don’t apologize,” I say before he has a chance to get the words out. I know that’s what he’s going to say, and I know it’ll break my heart to hear. He gives me a strange look, and I shrug. “Don’t tell me you weren’t going to.”

“I was,” he admits, and to my surprise and delight, he laughs. “It’s just kind of creepy that you knew that.”

“I still know you pretty well, I guess.” I crack a grin. I feel a little bit tingly, and I have a deep fluttery excitement in my stomach from being around Paul. “You never got the chance to answer me. Did you want to catch up? Maybe somewhere that’s not here with your uncle.”

“Yeah, I do,” Paul says and unlike before, his tone sounds sure. “Lemme grab my shoes and jacket, okay?”

I watch him dart inside. I lean against one of the posts on the porch and feel a smile on my lips. I feel more excited than I’ve felt in a long time. I’m pretty amazed at how much of a high I’m on just from getting a chance to hang out with Paul again.

“Where are we going?” He asks when he’s back outside and shutting the door behind him.

“I have an idea,” I say with a cheeky smile, intentionally vague. I stand up straight and begin walking. “Do you trust me?”

“Yeah, of course, I do,” Paul says which makes me flush. I’m glad he’s behind me so he can’t say it. “Lead the way, Sammy.”

The butterflies in my stomach go crazy when he calls me that. Only a few people ever called me Sammy: my Dad, Mark, and Paul. It feels intimate in a way that makes my cheeks heat up.

When I’m less embarrassingly flustered, I slow my pace so we’re side by side. We reach downtown, and it gives me a sense of Deja-vu. We used to walk around together a lot, getting food and just talking. It was on this same section of sidewalk where we held hands for the first time. It feels so long ago but still so fresh.

“I hope you’re in the mood for pizza,” I say and open the door for him when we arrive at the pizzeria.

“God,” he breathes out as he looks around before smiling at me. “It’s weird as hell being back here.”

“It was our favorite place, so I thought it made sense.” We’re seated quickly since it’s dead inside, as always. One of the benefits of a small-town. “Pretty sure we’ve sat in every single one of the booths.”

“No doubt,” Paul laughs. Neither of us even glances at the menu. We were both gone for a long time but could probably recite the menu by heart. “It’s a damn good pizza, I can’t deny that.”

“It’s not all bad here,” I offer. He tilts his head sideways in a cute gesture I remember vividly, and his face looks conflicted. I can’t blame him. There are so many bad memories here for him. It makes me want to help him make better ones so that even when he does leave, there’s something positive here. “I want to hear about what you’ve been up to since I saw you last.”

Paul takes a moment to think about it before diving in. He tells me all about his life in Denver and how much he loves it. He talks about it with fondness and enthusiasm. He tells me about volunteering at youth shelters and going out with his friends. He tells me about the active gay community there and how it’s been basically like a family for him.

I’m completely entranced as he talks. He seems so carefree and genuinely happy that it warms my heart. There’s an easy smile on his lips the whole time, and I know I’m probably staring at them too much.

“I’m so happy to hear that,” I chime in after a bit. “I really worried about you when you left. I spent a lot of time hoping and praying that you were safe and happy.” I set my slice of pizza down and wipe my mouth. “I’m sorry you had to leave that great life and come back to deal with your uncle. I can’t be sorry that I get to see you though.”

“It is what it is.” He shrugs a bit. “I’m having fun right now though, and that’s all that matters.”

I can’t help but say hell yeah. Those butterflies from earlier return, but they’re stronger now. “My hope is you can leave here with some good memories.”

“I think you’ll be able to do it,” He agrees and gives me such a sweet smile that I want to swoon. “You were always determined. Enough talking about me though, it’s your turn now.”

I fill him in on my life in the military and update him on anything mildly interesting I can think of. I tell him about my dad and Mark, them getting together and surprising us all with how perfect they were, and everything that’s happened in the last year. He looks at me with focused interest, and it makes my body temperature heat up a bit.

“And that’s pretty much it.” The server brings the check, and I hand him my credit card before Paul can protest. “This one’s on me. You can get the next one.”

“That’s fair, I guess.” I wanted to pay for it in the first place, but now it gives me an excuse to get to see him again. It’s a win-win. The waiter brings my card back, and I tuck it into my wallet before standing up.

“I guess I should get back.” Paul says, and I can hear the sadness in his voice as he says it. I’m struck again with that overwhelming need to hold him, especially when he looks down at his feet.

“Maybe this is presumptuous of me,” I say softly and reach to set a hand on his arm. I’m not sure why I do it, but it feels right. He looks up at me, and my heart picks up. “But do you want to crash at my place? Just until we can get your uncle out. It’s right down the way here, and I’d love to have you.”

“Are you sure?” Paul asks, looking reluctant and nervous. I knew he wouldn’t agree immediately.

“Yeah, positive.” I see his eyes dart to my hand on his arm like before, and I pull it away slowly. “I get bored living alone anyway. You’d be doing me a favor, honestly.”

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