Page 52 of Fae Exile

“No, this time she won’t. I won’t let her. I won’t let her touch you either.” His eyes blazed with the intensity of his conviction.

I scowled. “Don’t be arrogant.”

“I’m not. You know what I can do. You’ve seen me in action.”

I had, and before Rush, the scenes of Xeno fighting, his muscles contracting and lengthening exquisitely with such strength and grace, had been fodder for my private fantasies.

I held his stare until he had to look away to keep from tripping. “Just because I can begin to escape some of the hold of her magic—and that’s just a tiny bit, by the way—doesn’t mean you can. She’ll murder you.”

Xeno kept his attention fixed ahead, his jaw a firm, stubborn line.

“If not for your sake, for Saffron’s, then. She’ll delight in killing him.”

A muscle in his jaw twitched. A few clip-clops from Bolt later, “I can’t even get to Nightguard without a portal, and I can’t open one.”

“I can,” Finnian called from up ahead with a slicing whack to the brush.

So much for the illusion of privacy.

“There,” I told Xeno. “See? Finn’ll open one right up for you guys, and then I’ll rest easy knowing you’re both safe.”

“Nope. No way.”

“But you just said you’d do it.”

“I did not. I only pretended I was considering it ’cause I thought there was no way I could get there.” Xeno’s hand lowered from my leg to scratch his own. “If you’re going to Embermere, I’m going too.”

“Your sworn duty is to protect any and all dragons, and especially those that are the last of their kind, like Saffron.”

That same muscle in his jaw twitched. “I don’t need you to remind me of my oath.” His words were as hard as his stare, which he flicked to me. “I’m the one who made it, and I take my responsibilities fucking seriously, you know that.”

I did. I grimaced in apology. “Sorry.”

“But I’m not in Nightguard right now. I’ll still give my life to save Saffron, but I’m not abandoning you. I’m just not, plain and simple.” He glanced at me, eyes once more blazing with emotion, making them appear even lighter than usual. “So don’t ask me to.”

We walked in silence for several moments, during which even Roan and Pru quieted, presumably to listen in.

When Xeno next spoke, it was in harsh, hushed tones. “I’ve given my entire life to the dragons. There’s never been much thought of myself, just them. And I’m fine with that. It’s what’s necessary, and it’s what I agreed to. It’s what I’ll do for the rest of my life. But no matter what’s gone down with this Rush guy ... Wyn, I love you, you know I do. And I know now that it’ll never be between us.”

I opened and closed my mouth.

“You don’t have to say anything. I can tell. I can see it in your eyes. You love him as I love you.”

He waggled his jaw and I said, “Xeno...”

He shook his head. “No, none of that. It is what it is. I never figured this life would give me what I want anyway.” Again, hestared up at me. “But, Wyn, don’t expect me to give up on you, because I swear to you I never will. I can’t. I won’t be able to live with myself if I walk away from you and something terrible happens to you. So stop asking.”

More quiet interrupted only by our constant footfalls.

When he finally spoke again, I didn’t think anyone else would hear him. “Don’t ask me to give you up. Please. Even if you’ll never be mine in that way, you’ll still always be my Wyn. And I’ll make sure that’s enough for me.”

It didn’t sound as if it would be enough. My smile was sad, and I wasn’t entirely sure why, but perhaps a part of me also had always thought I’d love him that way too. “I’m sure someone else’ll eventually come along,” I offered. “You might not be able to picture it—her—now, but I’ll bet?—”

Xeno looked away. “No, Wyn. There’ll never be anyone else for me but you. Just let me have whatever you can give.”

Vulnerable admissions from a fierce warrior.

I gulped. “Then at least take Saffron back on his own.”

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