Page 35 of Ruthless

“It doesn’t make the shit any easier to live with.” He takes another drag off his cigarette and shakes his head at me as he slips the pack back into his pocket.

“What’s your point?” My fingers itch to steal the entire pack from him, but I fight the temptation and grind down on my fucking gum. It’s flavorless and like chewing on grass, but that’s one temptation I won’t give in to.

Like he knows what I’m thinking, Asher blows a cloud of smoke in my direction. “My point is that we’ve both gone through some serious shit, which is why we aren’t like Axel. Our demons are harder to slay but not impossible to manage. This shit will consume you until there’s nothing left if you let it, little brother.”

“So, what am I supposed to do?” I toss the ax onto the ground and cross my arms over my chest, facing him head-on.

“You find the light in the dark. The one thing that’ll keep them quiet long enough for you to survive through the day, and then you get up and do it all over again until they’re so quiet you can almost forget that they’re even there in the first place.”

His words hit home, and I know what he’s implying without him saying a word.

“Kennedy.” I let her name slip past my lips in a deep sigh.

“And your kid.” He holds my stare. “You do whatever you have to do to keep them safe. Axel and I are here to help with that.”

“What if they’re safer without me?” It feels like I’m chewing on broken glass as I say those words out loud, but a part of me knows it’s true.

“That’s bullshit, and you know it.” Asher tosses the butt of his cigarette on the ground and stomps it out as he narrows his eyes at me. “You telling me you’d be okay with someone else raising your kid and taking care of your woman? That anyone will protect them like you will? Because, brother, we both know you’re fucking lying to yourself.”

I hang my head and let his words sink in. Truth is, he’s right. I may be a fuck-up, but they’re mine. Mine to keep. Mine to protect. It doesn’t make what happened earlier any easier to swallow. “What if it’s me they need to be protected from?”

He pushes off the tree and closes the short distance between us. “Then Axel and I will be the first to kick your ass.”

“Please tell me you didn’t tell Axel where you went? I can’t deal with his bullshit right now.”

“Who do you think has Lily?” He cocks an eyebrow at me, and the two of us lift the corner of our mouths in a smirk. If anyone can distract our little brother, it’s Asher’s kid.

“It’ll be his turn to have one soon.” I have no doubt Axel will want a kid of his own.

“Let’s just hope it takes after Kelsey.” Asher rolls his eyes at the thought and then makes eye contact with me. “You good?”

“Yeah, man. I’m good.” And I am. I’ll just have to be more careful.

“Good. Come to the house. I did some more digging, and there’s shit you need to see.”

Judging by the tightness in his face, I’m not going to like what I find.

“Why the fuck didn’t you start with that?” I narrow my eyes.

Asher shrugs. “I needed your head straight first before adding more shit to it.”

“It’s straight now. Let’s go.” I turn and head toward my truck.

“One more thing,” Asher calls over my back. “Connor told me to remind you of Kennedy’s appointment tomorrow.”

“I didn’t forget. Show me the shit you found, so I can get back where I need to be.”

Little did I know that he was right. My head needed to be straight for all of the shit he showed me.

CHAPTERFOURTEEN

Kennedy

I sit on the bed to slip on my Vans and let out a small groan. Every time I move, reminders of what happened yesterday hit me. I can still feel Zane thrusting inside of me. Then I remember how things went downhill from there and that he left. I tried to call him once more after I left the voice mail, but after it went unanswered yet again, I gave up. I have more important things to worry about right now.

Movement out of the corner of my eye catches my attention, jerking me back to the present. When I glance over to the doorway, Rory is leaning against the jamb with his arms crossed over his chest. He’s in the same jeans and navy T-shirt he was wearing the night before. After Zane left, my brother was at my front door with a bottle of Vitamin Water and two containers of chicken fried rice. I knew him showing up with my favorite food was his brotherly way of softening the disaster that has become my life. At least he didn’t make me talk about it. We watched movies in silence until I passed out.

I woke up with a raw throat and aching chest. Sleep came, but it was filled with nightmares of the haunting look on Zane’s face when he saw what he had done to me. My thoughts must be projecting onto my face because Rory’s expression hardens. It takes me a minute to realize his gaze is fixated on my reddened cheeks. If he notices my puffy eyes, he doesn’t let on about it, which I appreciate. I feel a stray tear slip down the side of my face, and I wipe it away as quickly as possible, but he notices the movement.

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