Page 44 of Bound to a Monster

They’re so into each other it’s horrible.

“How’s it going?” I manage to ask, forcing the emotion out of my voice even though I’m practically vibrating with it. I want to ask a million questions. Like when will this freaking morning sickness stop? And why do they call itmorningsickness when it happens all the time? And a dozen other little trivial things that I’ve been Googling like an insane person.

“About as good as it can, I guess. I’m tired all the time and I have a dozen aches and pains and I’m getting huge, but it’s great.”

“You look fantastic. Seriously, you really do.”

“Yep, I’m glowing.” She rolls her eyes. “Honestly, if you asked Alex, he’d tell you I’ve never looked hotter, which I believe. That man can’t keep his hands to himself.”

“I guess, uh, he can’t get you double pregnant.”

She laughs at that. “If anyone can, it’s him.”

“How did you two meet?”

“Now that’s a complicated story. Alex used to be best friends with our older brother Step back in the day, but then Step died,and he and Lev got close after that. But basically, I grew up with Alex. Hated his stinking guts.”

“Really? You two didn’t get along?”

“Oh my god, despised each other. But I also had one of those stupid little crushes on him too. So you can imagine all the tension.”

“I definitely can.” I chew my lip and hold back from peppering her with a dozen more questions. Like why did they end up together? What’s their relationship like now? I want to know everything because maybe that can shed some light on my situation with Lev.

But I’m not Natalya and I don’t have a crush on my husband.

There’s no history with me and Lev. We had one filthy night of stupid sex and that’s it. Sure, he took my virginity, but it wasn’t like he knew it was happening at the time. Now we’re trapped in this relationship, and there’s no way it’s going to turn into whatever Natalya has with Alex.

I get her talking more about the baby and everything they’re doing to prepare for it—mostly so I can mentally take notes—while a deep sadness fills me. My life is never going to be like theirs. I’m not going to have some amazing revelation where I suddenly understand that actually Lev is amazing and I’m so into him. At best, one day we’ll tolerate each other, and maybe we’ll even be decent co-parents.

But there won’t be love. Not for me, not in my future. No comfort, no joy, no smiles, no adoring looks across a room.

If I had been born in another world. If I had a different set of parents. Maybe if the dice had fallen a different way. Maybe then I could have the life I’ve always wanted.

Freedom to make friends. Freedom to go to school, to join a fencing club, to do normal things basically everyone else gets to do.

Instead of the sheltered existence I’ve been forced into up until this point.

At least dinner is good. Lev’s stroganoff is incredible. I don’t have to fake it when I tell him it’s one of the best things I’ve ever tasted in my entire life, which Alex finds extremely amusing.

“She’s the best thing that ever happened to you,” he says, making a sharp joke at Lev. “Finally, someone likes your cooking.”

“Oh, stop it,” Natalya says, smacking her husband’s leg under the table. “Everyone knows Lev can cook the crap out of this stuff.”

“I’m glad you like it,” he says, giving me a strange, unreadable look, half caught between a cocky smirk and a sultry glare.

Natalya asks me about my life. I’m a little reluctant but slowly start to open up. I talk about growing up in my father’s house, about my brothers, Luca and Daniel, and Lev even makes me tell them about fencing.

“I always thought that was for rich assholes,” Alex says, frowning.

“What is wrong with you?” Nat hisses at him.

“That’s okay, I hear that a lot, but it’s really not. I mean, anyone can take it up. There are gyms all over the place that rent out gear or let you borrow stuff, and really you just need the clothes.”

“That’s honestly pretty cool,” Alex admits.

“You should see her in the outfit.” Lev’s smirking now. “She looks like a killer. I keep telling her I’ll set up a training room in the basement.”

“I’m probably not fencing again anytime soon,” I say, turning pink from all the attention.

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