Page 83 of Ava Stargazer

Her eyes rapidly darted side to side as she put the pieces together. It was so obvious what the way forward should be.

Hidden secrets can be controlled.

Fijjik’s words came back to her then, from several weeks ago. They replayed in her mind, in his slow, stilted, voice.It’s only too late if there’s no one left to speak.

“What would happen if neither one of us was a secret anymore?” she whispered down to the yellowish bubbles, gripping the container tightly in her hands.

The biologics swirled fast in response.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Ava said gently, leaning over Vox’s head as he slowly opened his eyes. The amber within looked cloudy and troubled. She had lain down beside him and was resting herself, but woke when she felt him stir. She leaned over him further, too close to his face, as she looked at his eyes opening. “How do you feel?”

His voice came out a bit rusty. “I’ve felt better. How long ... ?”

“A full cycle. But you stopped shaking a while ago. Rhutg checked in on you and said you were okay, but to not do any more ... breaking ... for a long time.”

The lights were on low in the engine room, a compromise for night between the dark Vox preferred and the light Ava needed. But still, Vox squinted as if it was too bright, and his blue face looked pale even in the minimal light.

Ava stood and brought him over some water and a plate of food. She sat both on the bed next to them, bringing the water cup close. “Can you eat?”

He ignored the food but accepted the water from her hands. He sat up and drank it slowly.

She itched to talk with him about her ruminations from the night before but choked down the words, watching his hand shake a bit holding the cup.Not while he is still not feeling well.“Can I get you anything more?”

Vox shook his head and sighed. He scooted to the edge of the bed and stood fluidly, stretching and flexing his muscles, raising his legs and stepping down heavily with each when he was done. “I will walk and get more water.”

Ava watched him walk off, hearing the shower start in the control room a second later. She busied herself with cleaning the room, and fed the biologics until a wet, mostly naked Vox came back, much more alert, with another plate of food for them both and more water on a tray.

“I’m better now. The water helped.”

Relief flowed over her, seeing him standing strong. Her voice slightly shook as she said, “I’m so glad you’re feeling better. Rhutg said you need to rest for a long while.”

Vox didn’t respond as he held his food up and began to eat while standing. Then he grumbled, “I will keep you safe, Ava. Rest or no rest,” and sat down on the bed next to her.

She held the fork in her hands while she looked down and squared her shoulders. “No, Vox. I need you safe too. It goes both ways. When we get back to Xai, we will take a long break. Maybe this was too soon after going to Torga. We can—”

Vox looked up at her, his gaze hardening as he cut her off. “Ava. We do not stop that easily. It was necessary.”

She tilted her head to the side. “At what end cost though? What if you didn’t wake up? I don’t like seeing you hurting ... for me.”

Vox put down the fork and pushed his plate of food to the side with crisp movements. He motioned toward himself with his hands. “Come here,” he said in a deep voice.

Ava didn’t listen. She stood in front of him, feeling obstinate. “I mean it.”

Vox narrowed his eyes. “So do I.”

When she didn’t move he said softly, “Now.”

His tone more than anything made her put her food on the bedside table and walk to stand before him, close, crossing her arms. Vox reached out and pulled her arms, bringing her down to him. She felt the strength in his hands as she sat on the bed next to him. He said in a terse voice, “I am not that fragile, Ava. I will not have my mate taking care of me like I am a kit, encouraging me to not take action because of fear. Do you understand? If you ultimately choose me, that will not be our dynamic. Now. Or ever.”

Ava didn’t respond. She just looked at him a bit in shock at his tone and the intensity in his eyes.

His hands gentled and tilted her face up to his. “Do you understand?”

Ava averted her gaze again. “So I am not allowed to worry about you?”

“Not in a way that we start compromising plans and changing things that need to happen because we are afraid of risk.”

Ava’s voice came out in a huff. “But Rhutg...”

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