Page 86 of Ava Greasemonkey

Vox spoke low in Ava’s ear, touching her midsection after he spent himself in her sex. He caressed across her stomach with the tips of his fingers.

“Do you want a kit, someday?”

Ava, in a halfway doze, startled awake at the thought. She absently gripped her arm, the one on the opposite side of her tracker. In the nightmares, it had come back to her what it was. In addition to the translator in her head, a permanent fertility blocker was put in her arm.

She took Vox’s hand and put it over the spot where she could just feel it under her skin. “I remember what this is. All the workers got them. It stops . . . it makes it so I won’t get pregnant. Humans have a . . . breeding cycle. I remember my mother having it where she bled every month. It stops that too.”

Vox fingered the area, probing around it gently. Ava felt a pinch as he pushed in. “Erox assumed as much. But it is easily removable. If you wanted to someday . . .” He looked sideways at her, assessing her reaction.

Ava looked at him, stricken. “I can’t. Vox, they took them . . . they took all the children from my mother. She had them and then they left, over and over again.”

Tears began to fall again. Vox held her as she finally broke down and shared with him what life was like before she came to the Phor ship. The things her nightmares were made of. The never-ending tests, the fear over what her future would be. So much love lost.

His fingers trailed over her abdomen as she talked, listening.

“Ava, it would not be like that for you. I would protect our kit. They would run in our fields, loved, as I love you. You are my mate now.” His eyes held his sincerity.

Ava moved her hand down to cover his, tapping on it lightly. She didn’t refute his words. She tried to picture what he said, the thought of a child.

Even though part of her filled with horror at the thought, a small part could see the appeal.

A child that didn’t leave. One that was made from both her and Vox. Would it be a perfect mixture of the two species? Or would it be a miniature of one of them? It was not appealing right now, but she could see, once she trusted Xai enough, once she felt safe there, that she might want that. That she might want to be a mother herself. And to have a child the right way, to see what a happy childhood could be like through their eyes . . .

She leaned back on his chest, sighing, adjusting herself on the pillows. She pulled her patchwork blanket over them both, relaxing again with him.

The thought called to her more than she wanted to admit right now, and Vox was still staring at her expectantly for an answer. “Maybe in the future we can, but I want to run in the fields myself first.”

“Are you ready?” Vox asked Ava, who was brushing out her long hair.

Ava nodded back. She had been leaving her hair out of her customary bun more now that Vox expressed how much he liked it down.

It was still wound up tight though when she climbed the engine, always mindful and respectful of the gears moving around her.

The cycles between Torga and Xai went by fast. By her rough account, half were spent in the engine hall as she recovered. But the second half of the trip was spent becoming close to the women, whom Ava visited daily. She hoped when she got off the ship their visits would continue.

Ava still struggled. Her mind was still fragile but time did help, as Vox said it would. She worried about what would happen, surrounded by so many more Vorbax on Xai and her mind still being delicate. She was jumpy at times, startling if there was loud sounds or even fast movements. She still slipped into thinking about her memories if it became too quiet, becoming quiet herself.

Vox worried over her when it happened. But she was ready to try to see what life on a planet is like. Time and making new memories was helping.

Ava adjusted her freshly laundered jumpsuit, checking herself in the mirror. Her eyes no longer looked haunted like they did when she first returned from Torga. Instead, they’d begun to regain their sparkle.

The women assured her that she would get some different clothing once she was on Xai, but Ava didn’t really want to change what she wore every day. This was her. She could tell things were going to be changing, but she didn’t want to alter who she was too much. Ava wanted to not forget herself in this new world. It was important to her to not forget.

Vox gave her back a reassuring rub as they walked out of the engine room.

Ava met the women in the cargo hall. She gave them a nervous smile, her body feeling light and jittery. It was her first timegoing off the ship in a place out in the open without having to disguise herself or be careful about not drawing attention.

The women flanked her as she walked out, all talking excitedly. They included Ava in their midst as if there was no distinction between her and themselves. Ava’s insides swirled, matching her biologics proudly displayed on her chest.

Vox stood nearby, smiling, but keeping behind her. He wanted her to be seen amongst the women first instead of attached to himself.

They stood in the cargo bay as they waited for the final landing checks to be completed automatically. The Phor ship had already landed on a dead space next to the nearest city, the thrusters turned off.

The Vorbax did not have a spaceport, an indication of how much they tried to be isolated from the stars. The ship compensated fine though, sinking into the hard-packed dirt that had been baked and compacted from other transports in the past. A more permanent solution would need to be found at some point. Or not. It wasn’t as if any of the Vorbax were eager for more guests from the stars.

The doors opened, the pistons creaking as they did. Ava noted that she might need to expand her maintenance to areas outside of the engine hall and tend to them.

Lirell expressed wanting to learn about the mechanics the last time they talked. It would be fun to have him help her work on everything together.

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