Page 48 of My Casanova

I nodded absently again and rubbed my thumb over the edge of the book. I wanted to just be left alone, but I knew Stan wouldn’t let that happen.

“I’m going to the clubhouse and kicking Smoke’s ass,” Stan muttered, mostly to himself but loud enough for me to hear. “They can put that on their damn TV show.”

I couldn’t help but snort. “You’re not going to the clubhouse, Stan,” I laughed lightly, though it came out strained. “It’s fine.”

“It is not fine to sweep a woman off her feet and then tell her he’ll see her in two weeks because he’s busy filming a TV show. This is Texas, Dani, not Hollywood. The man can give you some of his time.”

I didn’t want to admit it, but Stan was right. Smoke had practically disappeared from my life this week. And it wasn’t because he was too busy with anything other than the show. He didn’t want me around the cameras. He didn’t want me on TV with him, and that hurt. He had never said it out loud, but it was in the way he refused to let me visit him while they were filming.

It made me feel small. Like I didn’t matter enough for him to share that part of his life with me, even though everyone else seemed to be included.

I wanted to argue, but the words wouldn’t come.

“It’s not like that,” I said finally, my voice almost a whisper. “He doesn’t want me on TV. He doesn’t want me to be part of it.”

Stan stared at me with his brow furrowed in confusion. “What do you mean? All the other girls are on the damn show. Yarder probably has Poppy and Adalee doing all sorts of shit on there, but Smoke won’t let you near it?”

I nodded and bit my lip. My stomach twisted with a mix of confusion and hurt. I didn’t get it. All the other girls seemed to be fine with it. But Smoke… he didn’t even give me a choice.

Which wasn’t like him.

I could feel Stan’s anger on my behalf, but it only made me feel worse. It was as if I wasn’t enough for him, and maybe that was the truth. Maybe I wasn’t what Smoke wanted, and that stung more than I cared to admit.

Stan waved his hand in front of my face and snapped me out of my spiral. “Honey,” he said, his voice gentle now.

I blinked rapidly and realized I had zoned out again.

I tried to shake it off, but the worry inside me wouldn’t settle.

The bell above the door chimed, and the sound jerked me back to reality. A group of people walked into the shop, and I immediately recognized them.

Yarder, Adalee, Poppy, Fallon, Fade, Compass, and some guy I didn’t know.

And trailing behind them? A camera crew.

Oh, boy.

Yarder gave me a lazy smile as he approached the counter. “You good with us filming in here?”

Stan was already putting on his showman act and strutted over to the door with his arms wide open. “Sure, sure, of course,” he said with exaggerated enthusiasm. “Please, please, come on in and experience Wine and Cheese Me!”

I rolled my eyes at his antics. Stan was laying it on thick. He could be such a drama king, but it worked for him.

“Hey!” Fallon and Adalee called out in unison. They made their way over to the counter, with Poppy following behind them.

“We were just down the way talking to the landlord about the open space,” Adalee explained and looked excited.

“Open space is right,” Fallon added with a laugh. “There’s a damn hole in the ceiling.”

Poppy leaned against the counter, and her eyes flicked to me briefly. “Which is why he’s giving you guys such a great deal on rent.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. I had seen the hole in the ceiling when I passed by earlier. The landlord must’ve been desperate if he was offering them a deal.

“So, you guys are going to do it?” I asked and leaned against the counter.

“We still need to discuss it,” Yarder butted in, and he crossed his arms over his chest. “We’re not saying yes to anything until we put it up for a vote.”

Adalee shot him a look. “You mean a vote I don’t get a vote in?” She tipped her head to the side, and a smirk played on her lips. “That doesn’t sound right, but I know that it’s right.”

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