Page 74 of Moonlit Kisses

“Hard would be an understatement, Molly.” He looks at me with disbelief in his eyes. He glances up at Joanna and Beth. “They lived out of Nicole’s car until Molly was eleven.” Joanna and Beth gasp and I stare at him in disbelief, trying to block them out.

Hurt fills me swiftly and I pull away from him to stand on shaky legs. “Max. I shared that with you in confidence. It wasn’t your place to tell anyone. You had no right.” I scan the room, seeing faces full of pity. I spin on my heel, grab my bag, and take off out the front door before anyone can stop me.

Run.

I need to run.

Even though I don’t have my running gear on, I take off sprinting down the street, the sun sits heavy on the horizon as the streetlights turn on. I’m not sure where I’m going to go, but I can’t be in that house with Beth and Joanna looking at me with eyes full of pity and guilt. I’m not sure why I’m hurt that Max told them about my living arrangements growing up, but I am.

My lungs burn and my feet hurt from pounding the concrete in the wrong shoes, but my mind won’t switch off. What are they going to think of me? Will they think I’m less than because of the way I grew up? Will they blame Mom? I don’t want them to. She did the best she could with what she had. She could have taken better-paying jobs, but she always put me first. She never wanted to leave me in care, and we had no family to look after me, to allow her to work longer hours.

I don’t want them to judge her.

I don’t want them to judgeme.

Max’s workshop comes into view, and I slow down. At the bottom of the steps, I kick out my feet with my hands resting on my hips to catch my breath. I’m tempted to go upstairs and curl up on the bed, but Max might come here looking for me and I can’t face him right now.

Walking around to the back of the workshop, my car comes into view. I’ve been leaving it here most nights. It’s easier for Max and me to share a ride to work now that I’m living with him. I climb in and drive.

It’s not like I’ve got anywhere to go. I drive aimlessly through the streets until I find myself at the beach. I’m not surprised I ended up here. There’s something about the beach that calms and settles me. Reaching into the backseat, I grab the jacket that I left there and climb out of my car. I lock it and head down to the shoreline, my shoes sinking into the soft sand as I trek closer to the water’s edge. Crossing my legs, I drop to my butt and watch the waves kiss the shore by moonlight. I pull my jacket tighter around my body and drop my chin to my knees. I get lost in watching the waves roll in and out.

Max never gave me the impression he felt sorry for me, but maybe he does. I never want anyone’s pity. I think that’s part of the reason I enjoy volunteering at the women’s shelter. I know the women don’t want pity, and I’m able to interact with them on a level that doesn’t include pity or shame or judgment. It’s not something Mom or I ever wanted and I know it’s not something they want.

I draw in deep breaths and release each one slowly, trying to untangle my thoughts.

CHAPTER37

–max–

Fuck!

I fucked up badly.

She’s right. I had no right sharing that information with anyone and until then I hadn’t told a soul. Even though none of it happened to me, I have a sense of protectiveness over Molly and I’m angry at Martin, Joanna, and her husband on her behalf. But I should have kept my fucking mouth shut.

Beth, Joanna, and I stand in my living room in stunned silence. Slowly, Beth turns to me. “I had no idea. I don’t think she told Martin, because he would have said something to me.”

“Why didn’t Nicole come home? I don’t understand.” Joanna mumbles in disbelief. “That poor girl. Living in a car for her childhood. We could have helped her,” she sobs.

“Look. I’ve already said too much, obviously. But I need you to leave. I need to find her and make sure she’s okay. I need to apologize to Molly.”

“Of course. Please let us know she’s okay.” Beth reaches into her purse and hands me a business card. “You can reach me on this number.” She turns toward Joanna. “If you give me your number, I’ll call you once Max calls me.”

“Sure.” I shuffle them toward the front door, stepping out with them and locking the house.

“Do you think she’ll be okay?” Joanna asks.

I stop and study the two women. Creases across their foreheads display their worry. “Molly’s been through a lot and she’s as tough as steel beneath her delicate features. She’ll be fine. She needs some time and space to deal with everything. It’s been a lot for her. Losing her family,” I raise my eyebrows at them, “finding her father, half siblings, and now her grandmother. She’s gone from having nobody to having a whole new family she never knew. She packed up her life over east and made her way here on her own. In my opinion, she’s fucking amazing and she’ll find her way through anything life throws at her. What I’ve learned about Molly is that she’s proud and extremely independent. She won’t want your pity and she doesn’t want handouts.” I stride toward my car. “I need to go.”

I climb into my car and gun the engine, not giving them the opportunity to respond. They’re not my priority right now. I need to find my girl. It’s almost completely dark, and I don’t want her out here on her own.

Where would she have gone? I know she’s fit and can run for miles, but she didn’t have her running shoes on. I have to assume that would limit her somewhat.

Think.Where would she go?

I drive to the park a couple of miles from home. Maybe she’s there. It looks empty. Most families would be eating dinner now, leaving the park empty. I climb out to check the park on foot. The darkness makes it hard to see too far into the distance. I’ll have a better chance of seeing her if I walk through the area.

“Molly!” My steps pick up speed when I don’t get a response. “Molly!” I check in the tunnel kids often use to hide in. Empty. “Molly!” I call out as I wander around the entire space, becoming frantic.

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