Page 89 of Stolen Kisses

“Mrs. Miller?” My head snaps up at Emma’s married name being called. I hate that she still has the asshole’s name attached to her. Emma stands, moving toward the nurse and I slouch back into my seat.

She turns around, raising a sculpted eyebrow at me. “You coming?”

It only takes me a split second to respond. Within three strides, I’m by her side and we’re making our way toward the surgeon’s office—together. The way I always want us to be. I take her hand, attempting to give her any support I can. Immediately, I recognize the surgeon who came out to speak to Sally and John afterEm’ssurgery.

Stepping out from behind his desk, he holds out his hand to greet both of us in turn. Tipping his head forward slightly, he welcomes us, “Mr. and Mrs. Miller.” The hackles on the back of my neck immediately rise, but I don’t want to embarrass Emma, so I keep my mouth shut. Because we all know that words don’t always come out of my mouth in the right way.

“Hi, Dr. Barnes. Uhm, this is my friend, Theo.” She gestures toward me.‘Friend’. I hate it.

“Oh, sorry, I assumed. Please, take a seat.” He gestures to the seats opposite his desk before looking at Emma. “Are you happy to discuss your results and what we need to do moving forward, with your friend in the room?”

Emma looks at me as she answers, “Yeah.”

I squeeze her hand.

To show how much I appreciate her trust.

To show her I’m here for it all.

To show her that I love her. Not that I’ve told her I love her. I don’t think she would want to hear it at this point. She would assume it’s out of sympathy or regret—which is ridiculous.

“Okay. As you know, your DCIS was spread throughout the ducts in both breasts, meaning we had to removeallof the breast tissue. We discussed this before the surgery, so that shouldn’t be a surprise.” Emma already explained this to me, so I’m not shocked to hear this. “The pathology results show that we removed all of the cancerous cells from your breasts. The sentinel nodes were clear, which is a great indication that the cancer hadn’t spread any further. I am, however, recommending you get a second opinion from a medical oncologist due to the size of the mass we removed. I’ve booked you an appointment in three weeks. At this stage, if their results corroborate with mine, I don’t see any need to follow up with radiotherapy.” Emma’s shoulders drop and the tightness around hereyesreleases, while a small smile touches her lips.

She looks across to me, her smile widening as I squeeze her hand in relief, returning her grin. I can’t imagine how relieved she must feel, because my relief is immense. For the first time sincelearningaboutEm’scancer, I can take a full breath.

“That’s great news, Dr. Barnes.”Em’svoice is brighter than it’s been since we first reconnectedin the hospital. We finish up, then return to the waiting room forher follow-upappointment with her plastic surgeon. It’s a great setup with all of the breast care surgeons and nurses in one place, making it easier for the aftercare process.

“Emma Miller.” We both stand, making our way toward her plastic surgeon.

“Hello, Dr. Corrigan.” We follow the woman down a short hallway to her room.

“It’s great to see you, Emma. You’re looking as though you’re doing really well.”

“Other than feeling tired, I feel as though my recovery is going smoothly.”

“That’s great to hear.How are the drains coming along?”

Emma handshertherecords she’s been keeping. “Down to twelve mils the last couple of days.” They’ve been annoying the shit out of her. I know she’s hoping the doctor will remove them today.

Dr.Corrigannods. “That sounds great.”She scans the paperwork. “Okay, can you hop up on the table over here, take off your shirt, let’s take a look.”

I reluctantly release her hand as Em nods in confirmation, then stands to make her way over to the table. Removing her cardigan and shirt, she raises her head, our eyes locking. I can read the worry in their depths. I haven’t seen her scars. She changesher dressings privately, not allowing me to see everything. I tip my head forward, giving her a wink as the only way I can show her it’ll be okay. She removes the final article of clothingwhich ishiding her from me. When all of this is done, I’m taking her lingerie shopping. I don’t want her thinking she needs to hide anything from me—ever. I want her to celebrate her success against this fucking insidious disease.

The doctor carefully peels away the dressings covering her scars. Red, angry lines from the side of each breast almost reaching the nipple are revealed. I don’t know how to portray to her that the scars aren’t ugly to me. They don’tfuckingmatter. They don’t lessen how beautiful she is, nor do they reduce how sexy I find her. They’re a sign that she survived something that some women don’t. I swallow hard at the thought.

Did Mom and Anna have these scars?

I have no idea if they went through surgery but it was too late and the cancer had already spread or was it too late and they didn’t go down that path at all? I have no idea what battles they actually faced.

With the tips ofherfingers, the doctor pokes and prods gently along the line of the scar, paying particular attention to each end.

“These incisions are looking fantastic. The bruising is on track and so is the swelling. Your healing is coming along very nicely. Have you been following the high protein diet I recommended?”

She smiles at me before answering Dr.Corrigan. “I have. Theo’s been cooking for me, making sure I follow the regime to the letter.” My chest puffs up with pride that I was able to help my girl in some small way.

“Great. Your nipples are looking really good at this stage. Just keep an eye on them. We’re not quite out of the woods with them yet.” Emma nods in acknowledgment. “Let’s remove these drains.” Dr.Corrigansmiles at her.She must have some idea of what these women go through physically and emotionally after such significant surgery.She’s been incredibly gentle and respectful with Em.

As Dr.Corriganwashes herhands anddonsgloves, Em turns to me. “Yay,” she whispers. Her smile is so wide, I want to snap a photo to remember this moment forever. She has a sparkle in her eyes, one I haven’t seen since before I fucked up.

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